I have red many articles and heard from people saying that a person who broke up he feels relief at that time that he got rid of other person (at that time the person who suffered breakup feels pain) but after few weeks or time the person who suffered starting to get normal but the person who broke up started to feel pain and getting hurt and started memorizing the past things and getting his/her feelings back
Is it so?
I believe it depends on the reasons for break up and weather person who dumped you has a rebound relationship or not. I'd like to see more input on this too. I know that my ex-gf is preoccupied thinking about another guy now because he lives out of state and she probably has no time to think about me. Once her honeymoon phase is over I'm pretty sure she'll start remembering things about us and missing all the good times we had together. I mean, we have history together and no matter where she goes something will remind her on me. I don't think she'll want me back though, she's that kind of person, she'd rather suffer than try to reconcile! That's what I'm waiting for, then I'll try to bring myself back into her life and see how it goes. that is of course unless I really move on in the meantime.
You have nothing to lose, just wait and give her (him) some time. There is no guarantee but it all makes sense, we're just humans and unless other person never cared about you, there must be some feelings left.
Also I tried "begging" approach before and it didn't work. All I managed to get out of it was few kisses and cuddling before she finally dumped me for good.
Break up always happen when there is something going really bad in a relationship so obviously the reason for any break would not be a pleasant one
For example my gf broke up with me 1 and a half mnth ago coz we were having disputes for last 2weeks and she said she is fed up and she said um jst reminding the bad thngs you said in these 3 years (she use to forget evry bad thng after 5 mins during relationshp)
lol you got hug on begging but you know wat i got on begging?
this reply "you are forcing me to be in relationshp with you n nobody can force anyone"
she was so rude to me as i was her enemy she never behaved like ths in 3 years she was totaly a change person
when i tried to request her to come back she changed her contacts n thn i tried to call her on landline her uncle picked that up n everythng got messed up n after dat she also changed her id's lol
now i dont have any contact with her for 19 days but still hoping that may be one day she will miss me n come back
ur comments will be appreciated just-me
no, not strictly true. people can break up on amicable terms for reasons such as... feeling more like best mates than bf/ gf and not being able to stand a long distance relationship.Quote:
Originally Posted by Brokenapart [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
yeah in that case 90% chance is there that u will get ur feelings back
but um actually asking abt the breakups that ended due to fights n disputes
I can understand when people get fed up because of arguments or disputes. That was not my case and that makes things even worse for me. feeling that someone dumped you just because someone new and existing came along and our relationship was just an ordinary long term relationship with same patterns and routines. eventually every relationship gets to that point, that's when respect and appreciation for each other comes in and love takes another shape. I don't think it's possible to maintain the same level of initial excitement and fun for years. When the reality kicks in you know you can rely on each other. You trust each other. You still make each other happy and you can still make that person enjoy making love with you. of course, sex will not be as exciting and wild like in the beginning, you won't do it 5 times a day, but I think it applies to everything. first kiss happens only once. First sex happens only once. It doesn't mean we can't enjoy kissing or making love in through our lives, but it will never be like the first time! I guess that's why people cheat and break up, because they seek that thrill. It's a vicious circle, and now I'm afraid of any future relationships.
In your case brokenapart, it seems like she really doesn't wanna hang on you and you should be happy for that. She changed her contacts, she doesn't want to be in touch so at least you know what's going on. It gives no hope, but it's probably better than person who doesn't wanna be with you but still stays in touch and keeps reminding you she's there. My ex is not letting me go and just when I start feeling better she reminds me of her presence. It keeps my hope alive though against my will and I keep analyzing everything she does or says. I feel like she's either playing with me or she doesn't really know what she wants. She made it clear to some friends that she doesn't wanna get back together, but the way she said it seems more like she's trying to make herself believe in that. She was never mean to me and I don't understand why she behaves this way.
I think you should let her go, she made it clear and at least she's not there to remind you of her presence. It's hard but it should make things easier for you. If she ever comes back, good, but don't count on it. Don't beg. Be happy or at least appear happy and sooner or later someone will see that and tell her. I think that my ex was surprised how fast I moved on and maybe that's why she's trying to make me jealous. Still I know she doesn't want me back, at least not for now because she's too busy thinking about new guy. I'm definitely going to play this game to the end, try to make her love me again, even if I change my mind by then, at least I wanna see how this strategy works. I'll keep you posted
actually i was calling her that much and not giving her space and she kept on saying " i want to live alone,n rightly so if someone is fed up of you thats what he/she will want " firstly she just blocked me from msn and yahoo .but when i kept on trying and sending her text msgs and calling her she changed her id's also blocked me from facebook and changed her number
Do you think fed-up can be removed with time? and feelings and love is there somewhere in her heart but as she is so fed-up she is not feeling it and will not be feeling it for next few weeks atleast
wat do u say
I certainly hope so, but there is no guarantee. Even if she starts remembering good things only it still doesn't mean she'll want you back. My advice is do what I'm trying to do right now: move on! In that case, if she comes around - good, if not at least you'll be ready to continue your life. It's probably not what you wanna hear right now, but we're all in the same boat. for some of us it may work out, for some of us it will not and we'll have to leave our past behind. at least you should find comfort in knowing you're not alone.