My girlfriend dumped me, help me get her back.

Printable View

10-10-10, 08:14 AM
lolreconlol

My girlfriend dumped me, help me get her back.

Anyway, I'm 20, my girlfriend (ex) is 18. We dated for about nine and a half months. I'm a junior in college, she is a freshman. She dumped me on Sunday, because of the following reasons; that I didn't have a job, that I didn't take her out for dates (she paid a lot because I didn't have a job, and she always wanted to go out), and because I just went along with things she said. Obviously, since I'm a guy, I did all the stupid things (texting her, calling her, while she's telling me to leave her alone). She also said that I need to get my life in order. She said she wanted to see me Wednesday, and stupid me thought she wanted to try and work it out - turns out she just wanted Wednesday in order to get closure. She told me to move on and get on with my life, because any time she looks at me and thinks about the nine months she "wasted" on me. At the end of the night, she kissed me a few times, hugged me, and walked away.

Fast forward to yesterday, I've still been texting her a little, trying to get her back - and she flips out. She sends me like two paragraphs of just yelling at me. I ignore her then, and during the day she says "I want my necklace back" twice, because she left it at my house. Later that night, she texted me saying I'm sorry for being so mean, it was the only way to get through to you. She then says how she feels like the only way we can see "if we're right for each other" is to get out there and see what else there is. She said she wants to get back to how she WAS (taking pictures, drawing, etc, then "regroup"). So I say I don't know if I'll have time to give her the necklace this weekend (lie), and she says "umm how about Monday the 18th"? So I say yeah, and I also ask her out for Friday the 22nd (a day before 10 months), and she says yes. Anyway, today she says that her "hatred" for me has gone down from about 75% to around 45%.

So that brings us up to the present! She told me what my main flaws were (no job, no "direction") and I'm applying for jobs, and an internship). My current situation is that at 5:55, she said "back to work. bye", and I didn't answer. All or most of my friends are saying just forget about her. I want someone that will give me some kind of hope.. So, a few questions!

1. Is it possible to ask her out on Friday the 22nd? I don't like just being her "friend"
2. Should I text her anything back after the "back to work. bye" text?
3. If I want to get her back to being my girlfriend on the 22nd, what do I need to do?

Someone help, thanks. :(
10-10-10, 09:06 AM
whiteboy93

1. It is possible, but there is a slim chance depends on how things go. No one likes the feeling of being a friend with their ex.
2. It is better not to reply or keep it short.
3. Maybe tell her that you will definitely change for good. But you should try not to talk to her for couple of days or even a week and make her miss you. I think if you keep bothering someone the person might dislike you more and find you desperate in a way, no offense. So I would keep it calm and continue life as normal and pretend you are perfectly fine with it and see if she might say something to you after a week or so without communication. But I would say if the person really is over, nothing would change their mind. If in the end, things did not go as plan, try your best to respect her decision and continue on. Goodluck
10-10-10, 09:38 AM
lolreconlol

Quote:

Originally Posted by whiteboy93 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

1. It is possible, but there is a slim chance depends on how things go. No one likes the feeling of being a friend with their ex.
2. It is better not to reply or keep it short.
3. Maybe tell her that you will definitely change for good. But you should try not to talk to her for couple of days or even a week and make her miss you. I think if you keep bothering someone the person might dislike you more and find you desperate in a way, no offense. So I would keep it calm and continue life as normal and pretend you are perfectly fine with it and see if she might say something to you after a week or so without communication. But I would say if the person really is over, nothing would change their mind. If in the end, things did not go as plan, try your best to respect her decision and continue on. Goodluck

So what should my immediate plan be? When should I text her next, and say what? On Wednesday I tried to tell her that I changed, that I made changes in my life, and she just said "no", because she hates me. She keeps saying we have to see other people, and take some time away from each other before we can see if we are right for each other - what kind of crap is that?
10-10-10, 02:08 PM
Agape

1) You don't have a job, don't go on dates, she pays for things, you are passive and just go along with her
2) She told you to leave her alone, you didn't
3) You two met, she got closure and she is moving on with her life
4) You want to get back, she doesn't . . .you try, she doesn't like it
5) She wants her stuff back
6) You LIE TO HER

--> She's a smart girl, she moved on . . . I suggest you do as well, and not move on and get a girl - I mean get your life together. You're 20, get it together and start being a man.
10-10-10, 05:26 PM
whiteboy93

Quote:

Originally Posted by lolreconlol [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

So what should my immediate plan be? When should I text her next, and say what? On Wednesday I tried to tell her that I changed, that I made changes in my life, and she just said "no", because she hates me. She keeps saying we have to see other people, and take some time away from each other before we can see if we are right for each other - what kind of crap is that?

She is right, you have to see other people and take time away from each other. If you do not want a bad ending, I suggest you give her some time and think carefully before you want to say anything to her. Right now, your plan should be worrying about getting a job if you have not and there is a lot of people out there that actually need your attention and caring, not just one, like your family and friends. Hey, if you really love her, respect her decision and take every single word of her into consideration before you start thinking about getting her back. And btw, big changes takes awhile, you cannot really say you change and expect the person to believe you, you got to prove it man. So my last opinion is, endure the pain whether it is regrets or hate or sorrow just let it all go slowly and look to the future.

Text her when she text you, if she don't then just go text your buddy from 3rd grade. Give her "time" buddy. Goodluck.