Caught between my mind and my heart

I have been in love with the same man for over 8 months now. I met him online and we have met a total of 5 times. He lives in NH and I live in NY. We talk everyday and we know pretty much everything about each other. We mesh really well. He was never ready to commit or tell me how he felt for me other than "I care about you a lot". Due to that, I kept trying to forget about him and move on to other men. I recently started dating someone who is really amazing. He tells me he loves me and that I'm his world. He treats me like a princess. I care about him a lot. He and I don't mesh as well as I do with the other guy though. I don't feel the same connection or chemistry. With in the last few days, my NH guy has told me that he has developed stronger feelings for me and that he is finally realizing how he felt all along. That it isn't just because I'm with someone now. He was just pushing me away this whole time out of fears from past relationships. So here are my issues:

Do I try to be with my first love?

Do I attempt long distance?

Do I go with the person I know is committed?

Heart or head?

Ohhh and if i'm even feeling torn is my current guy the right one at all?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by angelicdespair [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Do I try to be with my first love?

Do I attempt long distance?

Do I go with the person I know is committed?

Heart or head?

Ohhh and if i'm even feeling torn is my current guy the right one at all?

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Ok 1. You need to make sure you don't make the wrong decision, I am surprised you connected with a guy you met online and have only met 5 times, are you sure you're in love with him or just infatuated..?

2. Long distance no matter how far from each other you are can always be a burden if you want an LDR to work then you have to make lots of sacrifices, sometimes problems can arise where one of you feels
like the other isnt putting in enough effort to see the other or you could be paranoid he is seeing other girls behind your back, I'm not saying this will happen but there are countless problems that could arise
with a LDR.

3. It sounds like a better idea, sounds to me like you never gave yourself a chance to connect with the other guy who treats you well, but if he is not the one for you and you feel you'll never really connect then
you need to let him know that you don't want to carry on living a lie, but if you want commitment and love then you will stay with the commited person as long as it feels right for you

4. There are constant wars between your heart and mind but there is the saying 'follow your heart' I don't neccessarily go by that line all the time but I will tell you my heart rules my mind alot
if my mind tells me to let someone go my heart will say no and keep me continually chasing someone I may never get back in my life, the heart is a strong muscle but the brain (mind) is also
a strong mechanism in the body, but whichever decision feels right whether there is a war or not then go by what feels right, just try be careful and steer clear from tripping over serious
obstacles that could affect you, here I am metaphorically speaking

and 5. I don't quite understand what you are asking here, do you mean 'incase the guy I am in love with online hurts me really badly do I use my current guy as a shoulder to cry on and an
object that will help me get over him?' .. be a little more specific :)

Sapphire x