I want them gone from my mind...

I was in a relationship with my partner for over 2years and we broke up 9 months ago. For the first two years it was really great he worshipped me and a day didn't go by where he wouldn't say how great we were, I was and how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. Only problem was in time he grew to want children where I was always certain I didn't. Then things began to change at the two year mark and he started to change and we ended up splitting up 6 months later.

Since the split he's not been that nice flaunting a new girl on facebook and then when it didn't work contacting me saying he'd made the biggest mistake of his life losing me. I spoke to him and helped him through it and told him that he hadn't because of how much he wanted children. Things were just getting okay with us and I thought we could be friends and then he really broke my heart and soul. Him and my so called best friend got into a relationship. This hurt me so much she knew I wasn't over him and I'd confided in her over everything. He suddenly just stopped contacting me not even an apology. They weren't even friends and it makes me so angry how he can take someone out of my life and then say please move on and let me get on with my life(on his twitter wall-couldn't even say it personally in a email) when it was him that came into my life and messed it up. I hate them both now. She is a cheating, lying two faced female. The problem is how on earth do I handle this 2 people who made me believe that I was special to them and I thought would never let me down have done this.

Every single day I think about it and I just want to stop now. I've blocked their profiles on facebook and everywhere else. So its not like reminders are around its my own mind thinking about it. I know they say to get over something get with someone else but I tried this and it failed and it just made me feel even more let down as the guy just wasn't right for me and just wasn't into me like I needed and he's disappeared and avoiding me now cos he was only after a bit of fun and I had no interest in that.

Please I need to stop thinking about it.

Ok no advice at all? Well writing about it helped a bit and I found if I started thinking about it I just try train my mind to stop. Most of my friends are their friends too which makes it even harder as I need to be away from anyone that is close to them. One friend was even telling me my ex seems bitter over me. I didn't ask for him to say anything about my ex. People just can't help themselves so I just find it easier not to see anyone that could let something slip..I don't want to know how happy they are, what they're up to and all the rest.

Man that sounds rough... So you guys broke up, he dated someone else, they broke up, you started talking again, now he is dating your was-best friend? That sounds hurtful..

I understand that your trust is pretty much DESTROYED. I just got out of a 3 year relationship about a month ago, she broke up with me and completely broke my heart...

I wish I could give you an answer or something, but I don't understand why people do the dumb things in relationships they do either. =[ But if you need someone to talk to, we can talk on a messaging program like AIM or MSN or something. I could use someone to talk to and it sounds like you could too. my email is [email]robscherer123@gmail.com[/email] Send me an email if you would like someone to talk to.

Hang in there it is rough I know. Try to make some new friends, dress up, and go out and feel good about yourself. Always find things to do, if you sit by yourself with nothing to do it will eat you alive.

Yes that's it. Him being with a girl so quick after we split was so hard esp after he said he could never imagine being with anyone else. I know now he just used me when it didn't work between them as he was feeling lonely and me being a nice person was there for him because at that point he was finally feeling my pain and we were in the same place but obv not really as I'd not been near a guy in that time. Since he got with my ex friend I've had no contact with either and said nothing about my feelings to anyone that knows them. Well apart from the first week when I found out but I think I'm allowed that.

Yeah how do you trust again when the guy that promised you the world and was so into you does something like this to you.

Rob it's strange isn't it, how someone can become a different person right in front of you and not the person you thought they were. Why can't break ups be easy or at least not so painful in makes your day to day life harder.

I have been doing all the above and it does help a lot and being busy in work and learning new stuff helps too. I just hope 2011 is going to be a much better year for everyone.

Yikes... =[ My girl said the same thing. "I could never love anyone like I loved you" and she said she didn't want another relationship either... It really makes me wonder if that was a complete lie and if there is somebody else. The thought of them being with someone else is seriously the worst feeling ever. It's like imagining a friend being gutted alive in front of you. It completely tears you apart...

It's insane how close you can be to someone... I know what it's like to be played, or have someone not like you back, but what I had with her was no doubt something incredible.. I don't understand how someone can do that, or why they would even want to for that matter..

Having someone love you is the best feeling ever, but I'm honestly not sure about relationships anymore... I was in what I had no doubt to be an amazing relationship for 3 years, then she left me after 1 argument like I meant nothing... It's insane... And from hearing about yours and other peoples stories I really just don't know.. It seems like it happens to so much people and there's no way to tell it's going to happen down the road. Bleh...

It's going to be hard to get our trust back, I wish there was an easy answer I could tell you but I'm floating in a similar boat too. =[

Robby, I don't think the phrase "I could never love anyone else" is necessarily a lie...but I think the phrase pretty much identifies the speaker as someone who does not conceptualize or invision the future very clearly. Every single time.

My ex and I talked all the time about how if one of us died or we one day grew apart. I always said I would find another love, as I am happier as part of a couple. He always said our love was his one love in life, if it didn't last he would be alone.

He left me in May, and by August he was dating a girl seriously enough to discuss eventually marrying. This did not surprise me, because he has always had trouble conceptualizing. He means to mean what he says, but he doesn't know what he is saying.