How does a shy college student who has low self esteem and anxiety make friends?
I'm just going to dive right in.
I just transferred out of a two year college and into my state university. I spent one semester there so far..but I really just focused, I stayed in (I'm a commuter so I can't really go party anyway) and studied my ass off to keep up my gpa (4.0 since the day I started college..so I'm a super nerd shh :D). SO I really didn't get a chance to make friends. But I want to make friends..My highschool friends and I had a bit of a falling out after I came out of the closet..and my community college friends aren't exactly..good for me. I do not want to get into that though. Let's just say I need a fresh start.
So. HOW do I do it?! I'm so shy..I'm afraid to go to places like clubs/activities/parties alone and I'm too scared to ask people that I know from there to go places with me (fear of rejection). Is it even possible for me to make friends now? How? I'm going to check out the gay community club again (though the few times I went I hardly met anyone, no one really talked to me) and last semester I kind of met someone there and when I told her that I wasn't interested in her (because I had a girlfriend) shit really hit the fan so I'm afraid to go back (crazy lady).
Another thing. I'm a girl, and I am told that I look like a huge bitch -.- I have this serious face on all the time. I'm also told that the way I dress makes people feel like I think I'm too good for them (which totally isn't true!) I do not mean to brag but I'm told that I'm intimidating looks-wise, I am told that I look like one of those pretty bitchy girls. Idk..I thought trying to make myself look good was a social plus? I'm not going to change the way I dress just to make friends..but is there something that I can do that will make me more approachable? I would try smiling all the time..but then I'd look like a fool!
Suggestions? :(
Do you like the person in the mirror?
Sadly I think you are focusing too much on your sexual preference in term of attracting friends. Are you looking for friends in general or gay friends ?None the less, If you resent who you are, people are going to pick-up that you conflicted emotionally and shy away from you. May be you need to resolve your issues with your old friends or at least admit you too could have handled the situation in a more responsible manner. You may not salvage the friendship but at least there is closure and you can pursue new friends with a clean slate.