Me, the Ex, and my confusion
Ok first some background info. I dated this girl for about a year and 3-4 months. She was my first love and she says I was the best she ever had.....even now. I broke up with her on January 1, 2010. It was the final straw, she blew me off new years eve.
Now here we are, It's March 2011, about a month and a half ago we have a long conversation about whats been happening in our lives and what happened in our failed relationship. The primary reason we broke up was due to her just.......ignoring me for the most part. She claimed to never get my phone calls or text messages......like never. That is unless she needed me of course in which the phones seemed to be working just fine. Also let me add that I admit I was a bit demanding toward the end of the relationship when she begin to push me away which just pushed her even further away. Says she had a lot of emotions and didn't know how to deal with them at the time and panicked. Also she said she felt guilty about encouraging me to move to her new city and watching me struggle to get on my feet. I also got no emotional support from her there at the time. Now here we are trying again. Due to the circumstances that led up to our original breakup I'm really sensitive to the "signs" of history repeating itself.
There was a incident this Saturday which she called my phone maybe 9 or 10 times while I was at work. Honestly I can say it's not normal for me to not at least let her know i'm busy or doing something but this day I just couldn't. It was really busy at work and I was training a new employee.I explained all of this to her, at first she didn't believe me but eventually said she does...... Since Saturday night she's been telling me she hasn't gotten my call or didn't get any texts from me. Mind you, I haven't been blowing her phone up or anything but it only takes 1 text or phone call for it to get thru right? I would like a female perspective on this. We're not even in a relationship, just like a trial period I guess, kinda see how we interact with each other. I DON"T want to hold the past against her as I don't see that as a healthy relationship but I don't want to be a fool either and fall for the same idiotic crap I did the first time. I do still have a lot of feelings for her so I feel like my judgement is being jeopardized by my emotional interference. I've been known to call a situation as something it's not in the past and I'd rather not make that mistake again. She does have a full time job also and it keeps her pretty busy but if she came back to me wouldn't she want to contact me? I feel like I have to do most of the contacting.
For example she TOLD me to "text me if you want" yesterday before I went in to work (she actually called me on her lunch break) I did text her, no response. Said she was going to pass out when she gets home so I might not catch her....okay. Today, I figured I wouldn't be a sour puss about it, sent her a sweet message, wishing her a good day at work, let her know I was thinking about her. That was nearly 12 hours ago, nothing.Is she playing games or what? This is a long distance situation BTW, so communication is LITERALLY all we have between each other which is why this bothers me so much. Ladies, what's your take on the situation? Do I need to take another chill pill cause I thought I was pretty chill or is their something I'm missing?
I know it's always a long shot with an ex but I'm the type to exhaust all of my options before I give up for good so I'm giving this as good a shot as I can.
P.S. When I ask her about why she hasn't called me back or responded to a text she ALWAYS has a perfect excuse or reason. Always. Now when she was buttering me up to tell me she wanted to try again........phones calls everyday, texting all day and night. Now.......not so much.
