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Just curious to know how many of you have gotten back with an X-boyfriend or X-girlfriend after breaking up, and how long after the breakup did you hook back up? I just wanted to know because my friend just hooked back up with her X after 1 year. they couldnt stand each other and now they are getting married..hmmm.. Go figure...
i've gotten back with two of my ex's. it was really different because with both girls, there was a long time period inbetween the relationships. i think that if two people get back together after a brief break, it's not too bad. however if you let time pass people do change and that caused another break up in my book.
raverboy
aren't things complicated when you get back with ur ex? how do you initiate that?
i usually told them that i've been thinking of them lately, and usually i start callling more. where it goes from there depends on how the girl and i interact.
raverboy
I hooked back up with my ex a month after breaking up. I think it was too soon because she was still confused in the head and we ended up breaking it off after only 2 weeks. I think if a girl breaks things off you need to leave her alone. Cut her loose. She'll make the move to contact you if she wants... that's my approach anyway...
... basically the one who breaks it off should be the one to try to make the contact again...
yes fifa i definetly agree with you. To the poster my bf finished with me in feb, so i left him alone (which was so hard) and then in July i saw him through a group of mutual friends and he fought to get me back. Its all good now, because weve both learnt from the mistakes we made before and the relationship just couldnt be better :) all i need to work on now is the worry i have that he will finish me again hehe but im getting there thanks to people on this forum :) thanks guys! xxx
I wouldn't say hooked back up and I dunno if we would... But, we broke up for about 2 years or so, and we kinda started talking after that here and there...
As for things being complicated... Of course!
There's always some animosty somewhere, but if you really have "grown" after being apart, you can start looking forward instead of looking behind...
Oh and we left on very... very... very... bad terms.
I got back with my ex after 3 or 4 months, and its been really good. Sometimes time apart makes you realize how much you actually mean to each other.
I find it interesting all these people getting back with their ex. You almost wonder if it was worth breaking up in the first place. I'm curious to find out how often it happens. On this forum, I see more people gettin' back together than not. But I hear that generally it doesn't happen as often. I would love to get back together with my ex, but I know there would have to be some major convincing to snap me, because I really like my life right now.
:D
I think probably the reason that lots of people are on this forum is that there is unfinished business, and not the clear resolution that the relationship is 'over'. If I had genuinely accepted that there was no more mileage with me and my bf, then I think I would be working on acceptance and not schemes to try to win him back! (Don't know though - could be kidding myself!)
Yeah that could be true. I feel I did get my closure, although to this day, I'm still not sure if her decision was justified. In any case, I don't want to get off topic. I guess when this is really my first (shall I say) long-term relationship, only time will tell what the future holds.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tonia2
If you had something good together then abscence makes the heart grow stronger. You try and find other partners and they just dont compare to what you had and u know it. If both people feel this way then they will end up back together. Its quite rare that both people do tho, and once you do get back together its important you learn from your mistakes and the past...but dont live your present and your future by worrying about that past...
i agree with schuey. i think sometimes some time apart can really do both people and the relationship some good. although it might be extremely rare that both people want the same thing down the line, when it does happen it can be great. as long as you learn from it. i mean you obviously broke up for a reason, and you both have to take something away from that to make it work in the long run. personally i have gotten back together with an ex, we were together for 2 years. i broke it off, and we got back together about 2 months later. he claimed to have chained. and for the first little bit it seemed he had. but after awhile he got lazy and everything reverted back to the way it had been b4. and then ur left there like, "oh yeah, that's why we broke up in the first place!" so although it may be hard to do i think it can be done.
I think that we hear so much about problems in relationships and about so many broken hearts becuase all of us here are hurting and asking for advice. The ones who finally win their ex back move on and you don't see them on here anymore to tell you their stories. I know this first hand becuase after me and my ex broke up last year I got on a forum but when we got back together about a week or so later I didn't ever check back. Breaking up is usually NOT a bad thing. Either it shows you how much the other person means to you or that the relationship isn't working and you need to move on.