Relationship in danger, need help
I do love my wife, we're married for a year now.
We have many problems, we anticipated our wedding so I can get papers and stay in the country, I thought that was ok, but I did things wrong and have been utterly disrespectful: I have not made a proposition, I have not bought any ring, and after the wedding I made everyone know that it was for the greencard. This was a HUGE missunderstanding and we did not discuss this enough before and were not prepared. => a few month after, we finally got rings and a proper wedding, but it was her wish and she feels like I never really wanted it.
Now, it seems like I can't find a way to make up for it, and our relationship is in danger and I need help, I need to find a solution.
Here is her last message to me:
"
It really does bother me that you feel you have made so much progress, yet i feel that you are now acting as you SHOULD towards someone you love. I would expect you to be sweet and at least a little thoughtful even if you had not ****ed up. You have never gone out of your way to really show you care besides sometimes on holidays. It really is so hurtful that it has never crossed your mind to do anything more romantic.
i have no romantic gifts from you or tokens of sentiment that you have only given on your own. Everything i have been given, i had to push to get. Also, i won't lie, i think sometimes about how you used to ALWAYS talk about how you bought your ex a chloe bag. You have never given me anything even close. And please do not respond by explaining why you bought her that or trying to justify it because it will only infuriate me.
what have i done to never deserve anything nice, any nice gestures, etc?
unless you have an aggressive plan of action and can give me reason to stay, i can't. I feel like some cheap replacement for your whore ex and i don't like it. If i am the love of your life, shouldn't your actions prove this?
i am worth it and i have too much to offer to be wasting my youth on someone who cannot treat me like the amazing person that i know that i am.
"