Is it over?

We he finished things nearly 5 weeks ago quite out of the blue although we hadn't been getting on too well fir two weeks I thought we'd be ok. We had a disagreement 3 days before to which he had said he wanted to be in a relationship with me. 3 weeks prior to that when pushed he said he really liked everything about me, things were moving in the right direction and he could see no reason why he wouldn't love me but needed more time. I was a an idiot kept pushing and asked all the time where it was going and I think that's why he put the brakes on. We had been together 9 months but the relationship was a slow burner because we only managed a night a week because I work away. We both seemed happy, got on very well, laughed together and seemed mutually attracted to each other. When he meet my family 2 months ago he joked about saving up for a rock engagement ring for me. He always seemed worried about others guys fancying me and checked where i was not obessively but seemed a bit on edge if i was out with girls or work. There is was one thing that caused difficulty was he liked to smoke weed which i'm pretty against he would sometimes sneak off to have a smoke, he really enjoys it and doesn't want to change his lifestyle either. For Christmas and Valentines day he bought and made me very special things. Usually was first to make contact each day. It all went down hill after valentines day because I made such a fuss because I wanted to hear the magic words. I went as far as to say if you don't love me now it's unlikely you ever will. The background to the relationship is that he has had one very serious relationship where he caught his live in girlfriend cheating she went on married and had a child to the guy she was seeing. He still gets upset and angry when he talks about it and it was 2 years ago. He said to me on several occasions that he wanted to take things slowly for fear of it all going horribly wrong again. My previous relationship of 5 years didn't work out because the guy wouldn't commit and still lived at home which I think was a big factor in trying to find out so frequently whether we had a future + I'm nearly 35 and think I would like a family which he also said he wanted.
When he finished things he sobbed a lot said he would probably live to regret it in 3 months that he wasn't sure but it felt like the right decision right now and he wanted to do the right thing by me. He said he cared about me more deeply than anything, he loved me but wasn't in love with me didn't know if he ever would me because after consulting his mum she said he should know and if he didn't it was worrying. We exchanged texts and he said I deserved somebody that felt the same way. I never physically said I loved him but implied on a occasion. A few days into the break up I e-mailed a forward on to an account that he never checks which I had done on numerous occasions whilst we were dating at no
time had he ever mentioned or acknowledged anything. He replied some 10 days later saying hope works good and you're still successful? I didn't ask him anything just said here's a voucher. That weekend I sent him a text saying I'd been thinking and suggested meeting up. He sent a message back saying we had made the right decision and seeing each other wouldn't help or change things. I replied and said I wasn't sure it would. I apologised for being pushy acknowledged i should of been let things take there course and that i was disappointed that he couldn't take time out to a least speak to me on the phone. I also said if there was nothing left to say i'd get on with things. He replied with a blunt message saying we weren't right for each other and his feelings should have been stronger. *That was nearly 3 weeks ago and no there has been no contact between us since. Do you think it's over and that i've heard the last from him?
I feel like I'm going crazy. Thank you in advance. X
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