Whirlwind romance....it's ended...but a holiday was booked :( PLEASE HELP ME :(

Hi all I have joined the forum to ask this question from nice helpful people

Ok here goes, sorry but it's quite a long story so I hope you can read it and help me

I met this girl in work about a year ago, we where good friends for a good amount of time, then Christmas eve she rang me very late while I was working nights saying her mother had thrown her out after a drunken argument (she said I was the first person she thought of to ring)
Then mid February this year I invited her to mine for drinks, we drank lots, listened to music and we ended up 'surprisingly' having sex
The month that followed where endless days in bed, staying up all night just talking about everything and anything, lots of sex. It was a wonderful time , eventually everyone in work was told we where together and it was happy days lol

During this time she was applying for jobs all over the country to further her career in her newly qualified profession. A job interview in cornwall surfaced so we agreed to hire a car and make a week of it in a caravan park, everyday we traveled to different parts of Cornwall and had a fantastic time!! We also updated our facebooks as 'in a relationship with each other'
When we got home after the week she said we need to get back to reality a little (no more lying in bed all day (our jobs enables us to do that) which I agreed with.

From here on is the downfall & huge dilemma

We started seeing less of each other and was clearly more chilled out. However during that time we decided to book a week abroad at the end of april as we had talked about it.Then it was grand national weekend and she went to ladies day with a friend which I was fine with.
She came back and again everything was very quiet, occasional txts etc (something wrong so to speak)
On Tuesday night this week I went to her friends with her and got very drunk all 3 of us and at one point she said to her mate iv been talking to such n such on facebook (an old friend known to me) is it alright for him to come around?? I cnt remember exactily what was said due to the booze but it didn't seam normal. Anyway he didn't end up coming , and later in the night she said to me she didn't want to be in a relationship with me & that she can't see us having kids together etc
Night ended blah blah

The following night she expressed the end of relationship thing again and do I still want to go on this booked holiday with her in two weeks!? As friends

Then today when I went on my facebook on my computer he account was still logged on , and I didn't even notice, thinking it was mine I checked my messages and two very disturbing things where there

1. This lad that was going to come to her friends a few nights ago........she had said I am at my friends with myself & to call around
His reply was SHALL I????? ,,,,,OI ANSWER!!!! ,,,HEY SHALL I COME!!!? But she hadn't replied to them
2. A convosation with her friend she went to ladies day with read as follows
'they obviousily parted after the races and they asked each other what they did that night... My girlfriend said she ended up going for drinks with that Irish lad- he was very Nice, and he took her back to his hotel because she was very drunk and she got a taxi home around 4 in the morning!!!!!! Did anything happen? Who knows but it's still NOT ON!

So there is my dilemma!!!! Do I still go on this holiday with her even though after what she said and what I have now found out on facebook!?!? As friends but still have fun in the bedroom while there

(I must point out during this whole time of being together I was not extremely falling for her, and was questioning myself wether or not I should continue with it, it was just Nice to have the company and feel wanted ,however after Cornwall I did start to fall for her a little I think & and it does hurt quite a lot now.
I should also state this girl has had a hard upbringing, has just blocked her mum out her life for good reasons,,,,suffers from depression and is on pills for it....is depressed about living in a tiny flat because her mum let her down out the blue and moved out of there shared flat) so she is very stressed and confused
AGAIN THE QUESTION IS SHOULD I STILL GO ON THIS HOLIDAY WITH HER?? and loose out on the money ,which isn't much and I am not to assed about

Thanks for reading if you have made it this far and I look forward to your answers ASAP

Obviously you are no longer in a meaningful relationship.

So the questions are:

Are you OK with just going back to being friends? I think your answer is NO, otherwise you wouldn't be snooping on her facebook and wondering if you should go on holiday after she said 'lets go as friends'.

Are you OK with loosing the $ you already spent for this holiday? You just said it is just a little money. You probably will be spending a lot more money if you actually went. So I think your answer to this is YES.

If you don't go, are you OK if she tries to bring a friend (or 'lad') on your portion that you aready paid for? Because she sounds like she wants this holiday. And I bet she will try to freeload off of the money you already paid down. Here I will tell you what your answer should be. YES you are OK with it. It shows her true character. Just remember the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. She is likely to have very very much in common with her mom - unstable emotions, depression, drinking.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by reeba [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Obviously you are no longer in a meaningful relationship.

So the questions are:

Are you OK with just going back to being friends? I think your answer is NO, otherwise you wouldn't be snooping on her facebook and wondering if you should go on holiday after she said 'lets go as friends'.

Are you OK with loosing the $ you already spent for this holiday? You just said it is just a little money. You probably will be spending a lot more money if you actually went. So I think your answer to this is YES.

If you don't go, are you OK if she tries to bring a friend (or 'lad') on your portion that you aready paid for? Because she sounds like she wants this holiday. And I bet she will try to freeload off of the money you already paid down. Here I will tell you what your answer should be. YES you are OK with it. It shows her true character. Just remember the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. She is likely to have very very much in common with her mom - unstable emotions, depression, drinking.

---

Who said her mum was unstable and was drinking?

Massive assumptions there and even if she was that's a big leap to then tar the daughter with the same brush - judgemental much!

Anyway back to the OP, seriously up to you, either go on holiday and have some FWB time or cut your losses and walk away, either way looks like the relationship is rooted, sounds like you weren't that head over hills with her so might be an idea to pull back emotionally which ever way you go to save yourself some hurt down the track

Or just go on the holiday on your own and have a great time, maybe take a mate with you