Feelings change

Me 28 and my fella 19 have been dating 11month nearly.he says he loves me but I just don't believe him.i nagged him about it over and over until he left me,then I became the weak idiot-textin,ringin etc just to be told. I don't want you because of my insecurities. I was breakin down for few day and yesterday we met up n spoke and got back together. Now I feel i'm on egg shells, I mean if he left me and dint want me, wouldn't that just mean that he can go easily? Sex dint feel the same and now i'm wondering if we should of got back together as all that hurt seems to of changed me inside.i don't know if it will grow back or its hidden in hurt.i'm not very good at knowin how I feel.i know I have had a life of hurt and i'm broken inside.recently i'm startin to get depressed,don't know if its with the birth of my child or the not feeling wanted.what do I do.if I leave him again he's gonna walk for good. Its make or break, Why am I just not happy but if he went i'd be so upset. Feel useless and weak and I have noone I open up to so here I am. . .

Sounds like you could probably use a therapist.

Yes you should get therapist help.

Your issues are beyond the advice a forum can give you, this is more than just a relationship problem. Please seek professional help!