Ugh now what..

I found out that my husband had an affair. From what I found it was 2 1/5 months after I had our baby! I haven't found anything earlier than that. When I confronted him he swore up and down that it wasn't him when it was VERY clear to me that it was. After we went back and fourth for about 10 mins he finally said it was him. All he could say was he messed up. REALLY DUDE!! And couldn't give me any rhyme or reason. Which really hurt. He's walking around like he's been so great and as if we had the perfect marriage. So while I'm home taking care of 3 kids he's been out doing whatever when he's supposed to be at work. I told him that I didn't deserve any of this and I have been nothing but good to him. So he wants to work things out but every time I try to talk to him about it he finds away to not talk about. Kinda makes me wonder if he really cares. We've been together for a total of 8 yrs married not even 2 yrs when he did what he did. He works and is a great provider for his family. I'm able to stay home and raise our kids. I've dealt with the crazy ex wife and a few other thing that would have made any one else up and leave. I left my job, my family, and moved to another state so that we could be together after we got married and I feel like this is a huge slap in the face. We are goin to marriage counseling in a few weeks. But how do I know that he really wants this marriage to work and that he won't betray me again? Thanks

Men in his position cheat because the baby took all the attention away from them. Hes been number one for what 6 , 7 years? When a baby comes along this all comes as a shock. Im not saying what he did was your fault...it was inexcusable and totally weak. What it comes down to is lack of communication and fear on his part. I hope with counseling he will be able to open up to you......I recommend you looking up some mens article about this subject...do some research. maybe you will find more answers.