Is this a bad mindset to have...?
Much like I do every time I post something dating or relationship-related on here, let me start off by saying I've never been in a relationship with a girl, and never even really been on a date (or even in a flirtatious conversation). Honestly, I have very few (if any) attractive qualities, so it's no surprise to me that girls tend to not be very interested in me.
But that's not what this topic is about. See, something that's bugged me for a while is that I have trouble finding girls that I'm interested in. My mind doesn't seem to work like the typical male. I don't see a pretty girl and want to get her number, or whatever. To tell you the truth, I don't think I could ever just approach a girl I don't know at all (or at least very well) and ask her out. Not because I'd be nervous or afraid of rejection, but simply because I feel I need to know a person a bit better in order to decide if I want to date them.
My ideal "romantic partner" would be a girl that I could basically be "best friends" with, except with the obvious more intimate nature a romantic relationship comes with. The thing is, for me, it's very rare to find anyone that I'd classify as a "best friend" (female or male). I don't dislike people (well, not very often, of course), but I don't really have any "close" friends. There are plenty of people in my life that I'd loosely classify as "friends", but there isn't enough connection there with any of them that I'd put them in the "best friend" category. Honestly, thinking back, I don't think I've ever really known anyone that I'd consider a "best friend". There have been people that have come closer to it than others, but still.
So, I'm wondering, is this an unhealthy mindset to have, in looking for a "romantic" partner? Is it really so much more difficult and so much more unlikely to get to know someone BEFORE you decide if you want to date them? Like I said, the whole "cold approach" thing just doesn't appeal to me at all. But it seems like some people make it out like the idea of getting to know each other first is a more unlikely scenario.
And in that case, what about the "friendzone" trap? That's one of the biggest pitfalls I can think of, with my "strategy", but on some level, I kind of wonder if it's just sort of a "myth". How much truth is there really to the "friendzone" concept, and how does one avoid falling into that "trap"?