Ghetto Life

It was the summer of 1997,
when I met Pocky Lor at the July 4th tournament in St. Paul. As I was standing by the food court waiting for my sister Grace and her Boyfriend Thang. As I was standing in the hot heat, I saw a boy crew all dressed in Yellow walking towards me. I didn't care, so I took a fast glace and mind my own business. I heard a boy said: Hey, beautiful what's your name? I didn't answer him, so he ran up to me and say hey girl what's your name? I said... oh me? He said Yea you girl... My name is Luna Vang and you? My name is Pocky Lor.

Me: Nice to meet you Pocky
Pocky: Nice to meet you too girl, so why are you standing here all alone?
Me: Oh... I'm waiting for my sister and her boyfriend.
Pocky: Hey, girl if you don't mind could I walk with you?
Me: Nah, I don't but what about your boys?
Pocky: Dang, girl I'll find them later.
Me: oh... Okay, so where's your girl at?
Pocky: I don't have a girl
Me: so, why is that?
Pocky: I had enough..
Me: Oh.. for real
Pocky: Nah, Just joking.... I haven't found the one to meet my needs. So where you from?
Me: I'm from Chicago and you?
Pocky: hahahaha... I'm from here, the twin citie...
Me: hehe... that's cool

As Pocky and I hung out the whole two days at the tournament, we got the chance to get to know each other. He was very sweet, nice and caring... as the day came to an end, on Saturday night I decided to hang with him and his friends. My sister and boy cousin from Minnesota told me to stay away from him and his crew, but I choose not too. They told me, that I made a promise not to be involved with someone ghetto or in a gang and how come I ain't following threw? I told them not to worry because we are just friends and nothing more. So I went off with Pocky and his crew to the party, Pocky and I dance the night away and I had so much fun. At the end of the party, this one guy started bitching at one of Pocky's boys about playing around with his girl. It seem like a second only, when I heard Pocky saying hey Luna here's my keys go with Ling-ling and get our cars... I saw a girl about to throw a chair at Joe, one of Pocky's boys. I grab the chair and gave her a hard ass pitch in the face. Then I ran outside to get the cars with Ling-ling. We pulled up to the building where the party is at and I ran inside to tell the boys lets get the hell out of here.... Pocky and all his crew got into the car and we drove off. We all went to Pocky's house. Pocky's brother got bet up bad, Ling-ling and I cleaned the blood off him and wrap him up. Ling-ling which is Plot's girlfriend changed his clothes. I went outside to talk to Pocky, he was so made and wanted to kill the guy that bet up Plot. I didn't say anything, but rest my head on my lap and my hand on top of my head. I was crying because I was scared at the same time, thinking why this have to happen. He huge me and said he was sorry what happened tonight. I didn't know what to feel anymore...I told him, I can't stand living ghetto anymore. In my life, I have seen to many of my friends lose thier life because of being in fights. Pocky... please don't do anything stupid out of anger because it's not worth it. I clam him down and we went inside to check on his brother, Plot was doing good. I told them to keep an ice pack on him, keep wiping him with cool water to keep his temp. down and give him some pain killers. I asked Pocky to take me to my cousin's house? He wanted me to spend the night with him? I didn't want to because I was terrify, but I did anyways. I gave my sister Grace a ring and told her I'm spending the night at Pocky's house.... She said, she heard what happened at the party was that Pocky and his boys that was involved? I said No, it's not them.
Pocky took me to his room and I got out of my clothes and went to take a shower. Ling-ling gave me one of her thongs and I changed into one of Pocky's P.J. That night he held me close in his arms and I can feel his heart beating so fast. I ask him why he got to be in a gang? He said he did not chose to be in one, it just happens....
Me: You could have choosen a different path and not this one?
Pocky: I wish I could, but I can't.
Me: You know if you tried you could, why don't you and your crew all just settle down?
Pocky: Girl, I don't want to talk about this gang shit anymore.. because once you're gangster... you're gonna die a gangster.
Me: Honestly, I don't want to see you die.. I lost to many people in my life because of thinking like you.
In my heart I liked him very much, I knew that if I ever fall in love with him and dated him I would need to prepare myself for what will come his way. The next day, I woke up when my phone was ringing. It was my sister Grace, she told me to tell Pocky to take me to my cousin's house because we need to head home. I told her I'll be there in an hour. I went to Pocky's bed and while he was sleeping I started to kiss his whole face... he was smiling, I told him to get up because he need to send me to my cousin's house. He ask "why"? We are heading back home to Chicago. He said already? Yep... already.. Dang, girl I didn't even have enough time with you yet? I wish there is more time for us... but I need to go for now...
"hey, Luna will you be my girl?" I was excited at the same time thinking I don't want to be involved with someone ghetto. But I liked him a lot.... so I said YES.. I'll be your girl. He got up and gave me a kiss. He got some clothes one, then dropped me off at my cousin's house. I gave him a kiss and said " I hope to see you soon again, Pocky please promise me don't do anything bad or get into any fights okay?" He said, okay I'll try my best to stay away from that, don't worry okay. Have a safe drive back home and when you get home give me a call okay. I said, okay I'll call you when I get home. I gave him a another kiss and went inside.
Our relationship was going great.... we have been together for 1 1/2 years. So far he have been in 3 fights, which he made me very mad. I can't believe that we are still together because we both lived far from each other. I guess when you love someone, no matter how far you're gonna find away to be together. When he comes to visit me, I feel so happy to see him.... because I miss his voice, his smile, his sweetness and most of all him holding me tight in his arms and me feeling his heart beat. I loved this boy so much... with all my heart. Me having to break my promise not to love a ghetto person.
We got married and lived our life... everything was going great. He became a better person not for me but himself. He still hang with his crew but that is something that I will never take away from him. One sunny day, Plot and Joe went to the store to get some Beer. Pocky and I stayed outside grilling. The boys was gone for 1 hour and we started to get worry. Right when we where worrying the cops came to our house. They ask us, if we have a brother name Plot Lor? We said yes... my husband thought that Plot have done something. But it turns out it was worst thing that.... the police officer said... we are sorry but Plot got shot and he died at the sceen. My husband's tears ran down his face when the police annouce that to us. All I could do was hug him and wipe his tears. I can tell that he was very hurt. This was the first time I saw him cry... it broke my heart. I ask the cops, what about his friend Joe? The cop said Joe is at the hospital. He got shot but it only hit his arms. We had to go to the hospital to indentify Plot's body. It surely it was Plot... he got 5 bullet shot to his chest. I called Ling-Ling to break her the news. I told her to come to the hospital to see Plot's body for the last time. She came and all we could do was cry, as we where crying Ling-ling told Plot that she was pargnet with Plot's baby.... but he died not knowing.. the love of his life is going to have his kid. Pocky promise Plot that he would find the person that killed him. I told Pocky, not to do anything because the cops are already looking for that guy. We went and see how Joe was doing. He was okay.... Ever since that day... everyone got hurt bad, by the lost of Plot. The one that hurted to most was my husband Pocky, him losing his closes brother. He finally realize after his brother death that being in a gang is not worth anything but having a Name. Some of his friends and him got out of the gang. No one could do anything to stop them.
1 year pass since Plot's death, Ling-ling had their baby boy and named him Evan Lor, for daddy's in heaven. She got married to Joe... and Joe loved Evan as his own. For pocky and I we still live our life being happy.... we had a baby boy and named him Poka Vang-Lo. My husband, my son Poka, Ling-ling, her son Evan, husband Joe and I we moved to Chicago my hometown. We all wanted to leave to pass behind us, but in our memories it will never be forgotten. Every year we go to Minnesota to visit Plot's grave and kick it with his crew. We will never forget where we came from. There are things in our life that we wish we can turn the hands of time and change it. But it's not possible, what's done... have been done and we can't change it. For us, not to look back and try to live the future.
I know I have broke my promise to myself and me telling my parents before they died that I will change and be a good daughter and make them proud. But I have choosen to live my life with a person who people call a gangster boy. I have NO regret, I was able to help my husband get threw the hard and sad days. I don't care if No one is proud of me but all I can say I surely am proud of myself. God send me down to help my husband and that is what I did. Our Love will always stay strong.

Thank you for reading my story....
This story is a speical dedication to My husband's brother Plot Lor. Rest in Peace... you're never be forgotten.. you remain in our hearts forever.
Born May 12, 1980 - Die June 12, 1999

by Iva