Unable to Break up with Girls
I'm not sure how I'm going to come across in this thread, maybe as a bit of a loser I'm not sure, but I'm just going to try be as honest as I can to try hopefully get some good advice from some of you.
I'm 27 and have had a few girlfriends, none of which I've broke up with, they've always broke up with me, some for legit reasons, others not so. Right now I've been dating a girl I work with for 3 months. If I were to explain everything I have to put up with while being with this girl I have no doubt in my mind 99% of you would think I'm an idiot for still trying to work things out, and I know I am, but I just can't walk away (it doesn't help that we work in the same place of course).
We only ended up together because of a drunken works night out. Before that I had no interest in her at all, but as usual as soon as things happened between us you could almost say I latched onto the thought of being with someone again and allowed myself to slowly get into this girl through spending more and more time with her. Turns out though that she's not the type of girl I thought she was, she's pretty messed up in the head in all honesty, but I just can't walk away as I now have a lot of feelings for her. I can never look past how I feel right this second and I hate it.
My problem is quite simple, I simply can't break up with girls. No matter how much shit I'm put through, no matter how I feel I can never bring myself to breaking up with someone and I hate it. I jump in too quickly, get attached too quickly and just can't allow myself to "let go" unless forced to (ie - a girl splitting up with me). Plus I make little to no effort when I'm not with someone so feel like I'm going to be alone for a long time if I end things with a girl.
I really wish I could go through girlfriends as easy as that before finding the one girl who is right with me, I really wish I didn't feel so attached to girls when I get close to them but I do, and I don't know what to do about it, or how to change it. I just want to be able to break up with a girl if it's not working out, but I just can't purposely hurt myself by breaking up with someone I care about and ending up alone, missing her and wanting to be with her.
I'm not sure if anyone will be able to give me any advice, if I'm just wasting my time, but I wanted somewhere to vent, and hopefully get some good advice while doing so. :(
