Does she feel the same? What do i do?
So first the context of how we met. Basically she is my Aunts best friend (currently I live with my aunt and he husband) and she would often come down from Maine to see my aunt. Eventually my aunt extended an invitation asking her to live with us at my aunt’s house. I didn't really think anything of it because after only seeing her a few times before I did not have any feeling for her and thought that it would be fine.
After a few weeks I realized that I enjoyed her company and was sub consciously being extremely nice to her. I came to the realization that I had feeling for her but I was not sure what I should do with them yet. I also realized that she was decently close to me in age (me being 19, her being 23) and that didn't really have any weight on my feelings. A few weeks go by and I realize that I have very strong feelings for her but having never dated or felt this way before I have no idea what to do especially with her being my roommate and all.
Another week or two goes by and she starts asking me to go to dinner with her and doesn't really care to include my aunt or her husband but they were usually busy with other things. We talk and have a good time and I even paid the first few times we went out. Eventually though we needed up alternating who would pay each time we went out. The final time we went out together we went to see a movie and shared a drink through the same straw to save money. I'm still not sure if that actually meant anything or not.
Anyway after that movie I wrote her a love note because I thought that I was seeing signs from her and slipped it under her door and headed off to work. Days went by with no response from her so I had just assumed she didn't feel the same way and from that point on we have not done anything with just the two of us except for one grocery trip where I talked to her about it. She said that she was really happy when I was around and sorry that she didn't respond but that she already had a boyfriend in Maine. She also said that like me she was emotionally retarded and un-experienced.
That basically ended the conversation and I figured that I should just get over her and move on. It was at that point that my aunt started talking me that she had feelings for me. So I just got really confused and still am confused about what is going on if anything between us. My aunt also has no knowledge of her having a boyfriend; not that he doesn’t exist because she doesn’t tell her everything but I find it doubtful that he exists.
Just last week she had a bit to drink and had done a lot of yard work and while we were watching a movie she laid her head on my shoulder. Than I wrapped my arm around her neck and she laid on me for the remainder of the movie. I could not help but have the feelings come rushing back and I just wish I knew how she felt about me and weather there actually was another guy but I did not care because I still had feeling for her.
On a final note my aunt is constantly telling me that she is a very private person, which I can agree with and that she doesn't think she deserves anyone. My aunt also says that she is not very happy with the way she looks. I don't know if any of that actually matters though. What should I do? And how should I go about doing it?
