Sex buddys situation,but becoming confused if that's what he really wants?
A few weeks ago I met somebody through online dating,and we went out for dinner and drinks. Conversation wasn't anything spectacular,although not horrible...just felt like I really did not learn much about him on our first date. So we had our date,and I after drinking I really wasnt to keen on driving so we went to his house which was close by. Long story short,he gave me a massage which ended up in some good sex. He asked me to stay and I couldn't because I worked the next morning,so I went home. A few days later,he said we should go out again soon. I was interested in getting to know him better and see what happened,so I agreed,we should make plans soon.
After him making a few failed attempts at getting together,I became really frustrated and felt as though he was just leading me on or playing a cruel game. He would ask me if I was free this time or that time,and then immediately change his mind on the spot after I agreed to go. I remember a few excuses were "It won't work, I'll just be waking up around that time" ,and "That's about what time I go to sleep". (He works night shifts). He would ask ME out,and then make the excuses...it wasn't me asking him and him turning me down,it was him contradicting himself. So I told him I was tired of the games,and that it seems like he's completely indecisive about seeing me again,and that we should forget about meeting again. He apologized,said that he desn't want to lead me on,and that his life is too crazy right now to pursue anything serious. And that if I want to we can still hang out,he just doesn't want to hurt anyone. So I assumed he meant "hang out" as in having sex. He didn't correct me when I made that assumption,so i guess I was right.
Anyways I told him sure, single women have needs too. I said I'm looking for something more serious,but that we could hang out with each other until I found that with somebody. So we didn't talk for about a week and a half after that. I thought he decided against the whole thing,until he texted me 5 days ago asking me to come over. So,of course I went. He wanted me to bring a movie,so I brought a movie with me just to amuse him for whatever reason.....I knew we wouldn't be watching much of it.
Within 5 minutes through the door,he hugs me. I hugged back,so as not to be rude and weird about things. But i felt the hug was un-necessary. Then he goes on about how good I smell. THEN he starts the movie after pouring us drinks and some idle chit chat,and asking if I'm hungry and that he could make me something if I was. So he gets all cuddled up to me on the bed and the obvious happens. But a lot more than the obvious went on that night too.
He wanted me to stay,so I stayed...he spent the entire night cuddled up to me big time.I don't think there was a slight moment of being seperated that night. He would lace his fingers through mine,and kiss me on the head. And I'm human,I like a warm body as much as the next person so I wasn't going to push him away. We had sex 4 times,so kind of driffting between sex and sleep the entire night....I even got a nice foot massage from his toes (don't ask,it was a little strange,but interesting at the same time). And the real killer is when he whispered in my ear that he wanted to fall asleep inside me. I would expect that from a really close lover who I've known for awhile,not a sex buddy. But it was that time of the month for me, so wouldn't have been the best idea to do that.
So in the morning,after a final session he asks if I want to shower. I said I would get one when I got home (not trying to be more personal than I have to be with him and his house). I was also very careful not to talk to him much besides just random meaningless things....not really trying to learn about him if it's just sex. When I left he got up and I felt like a hug was expected,so I hugged him,told him have a good day,and left.
The cuddling and intimacy is really making my head spin. I feel like if we are just having sex with each other and don't want anything else,there should be none of this cuddling and added intimacy. I mean it's nice,and we do have great chemistry,but the point is to keep it simple. This doesn't seem like he's keeping it simple at all,and I'm not even sure I would want a relationship with him because I don't KNOW him. But I guess I'd be willing to learn if that's what he's trying to evolve into. But I can handle just sex,I have other people to date and keep me interested mentally. But with the cuddling and all,I'm not sure I can handle just sex....I think feelings are sure to come into play somewhere. Do you think he knows what he's doing and is doing it for a reason,or maybe is just a very intimate guy who enjoys a little extra besides just sex? He has to know he is changing the simplicity of sex buddys by acting this way....I don't see how this can stay uncomplicated if this is what sex buddys means to him!
