Hi all,
It's been a while since I've been on here, and I have moved past all the issues I've had in the past. But, some of them just won't stay burried.
The same girl that I liked last year, the one that has rejected me, asked me if I still like her as I did last year.
Here's a bit of our history:
We met in class last year, and started getting along very well. Turns out that we both had similar tastes in music, and TV and we shared a few other common interests. We flirted every single day for a while, a few months at least. She would ALWAYS sit next to me, even when the classroom was empty to the point where she could pick any seat she wanted, she still came and sat by my side.
I asked her out, and she said maybe. I told her that I would give her some time to think it over, and that I would call her back in a few days. I called, but she never answered, and I did not bother with leaving a voicemail. I started seeing another girl almost immediately, but I still had feelings for my classmate for some messed up reason.
A couple of days passed, and she told me how another guy had asked her out to the movies and she said yes. She told me she really didn't want to go with him, and just didn't have the guts to reject him, and practically begged me to come along with thme. I told her that I am busy that I had a date that night and that if she wanted to get out of it she would have to lie to him, which she ended up doing.
The guy didn't give up. He cornered her and got her to agree to go out "just as friends, but he would buy her ticket for her (how would that NOT be a date???)". Only this time, she succeeded in getting me to come along with them. During the movie, she sat on my left side, and he had to sit next to me, another sign that this girl was into me, or so I thought.
A couple of weeks later, we went out to a local pub with a friend and his girlfirend. We had a good time, and afterwards, we had our mid-semester break. It was after a Christmas party, after I had come back home drunker than I've been in my entire life, that I composed this humongous email and attached a few songs to it, basically professing my undying love for her.
BIG MISTAKE!
She told me she didn't feel the same, and that she doesn't want to date right now. Two weeks later she started going out with one of our classmates, and to this date they are still going strong. A few days ago, she had a minor fight with him, and she asked me if I still liked her in that way. I lied, telling her I don't. When she asked me why, I answered back with this:
"I was wrong to have any feelings for you last year, and it took me a while to see that you didn't deserve that sort of attention from me. I am more than happy with just being your friend. You said it yourself: 'I have never seen the two of us as anything more than friends.' The bottom line is, you did not deserve that."
She looked at me puzzled, and managed to say nothing but a prolonged "OK". She seemed uneasy when I told her this, and I could see just how uncomfortable she felt at that moment. Up until then, everything was normal, with no tension between us. Yet in this one moment alone, it felt as if I could use the force generated by this tension to move an entire continent. We still talk, but mainly friendly little chats about our courses and school, and our plans for after graduation this year. I just recently broke up with a girl I was seeing for 3 months, and had a talk with the other girl about it. She said "us ladies can be real bitches sometimes, but I guess you already know that, don't you?". I just smiled and said, "not every one of you", to which she responded with "you're sweet".
What in the hell is going on here?
Thanks ladies!
