Empty but kinda scared feeling...

It's been a weird couple of weeks really. I tried desperately to forget my ex and move on, I started meetin someone, even tho I knew I was no way ready for it...but I just needed a distraction!

My ex started texting me again at th start of last week, she said how much she missed me and she wanted to spend some time with me at home over Christmas and see what happened. She said she had spoken to her mates & said that right now if she could be with anyone, she would get back with me. Anyway, she's hurt me so much, that I didn't think all that would work...so I came out & told her that I had been meeting up with someone else. She was a bit shocked & upset...then she offered to take me out for lunch, for my birthday...we spoke about stuff & she asked loads of questions about this other girl. She got really sad & hugged me loads & kissed me & held my hand. We carried on th same way th next day & she was drunk texting & stuff.

Anyway, On Sunday morning, she tells me she is now in a relationship with th person she cheated on me with. So now I'm mega confused!!!!! I feel like I don't wanna go home for Christmas because it makes me sad knowing she is there & I can't be there with her :-( I miss her so badly, I just don't know how else to tell her. I've literally done everything....I've done n/c...she comes back & then goes again....ive ignored her, I've tried to move on, I've been her friend...she's jus...I don't know!!!!

She said to me the other day that I'm always the first person/thing she thinks about in the morning...she knows we work so well together....she even text me saying she doesn't know how she can be happier in this new relationship than she was with me because they will never love her like I do...or treat her th same!

So what th hell is she doing?!?!?

she's probably doing what most girls do when things aren't working out with the new guy...contact their ex bf. girls can be much more evil in love then us bro...
you're probably going to keep torturing yourself for a while...eventually one of you will move on and force the other to do the same

Sorry, but she cheated on you. Its got to be the end. You'll never trust her again (rightfully so), the fact she cheated on you shows there isn't enough there on her half to remain faithful. Plus the fact she's not giving you the time you need to get over her, tells me she's lacking of any morals and selfish. You've got to let her go man...I know it's hard, but there are better people out there. Cut ties and heal, she doesn't deserve your love and respect.

She has come to realize she had cheated on you
with a douchebag and wishes Santa would bring you
back in her life. She is desperate,that's why she asked
the questions then got upset over your answers.
But don't kid yourself. She will try to ride another
horse again later while being with you.
Move on.

Even a cheater is allowed to miss their ex and regret the end of the relationship however that doesn't give them licence to mess with your head. As hard as it is you should move on and focus on getting your head space back to a happy place so that the next girl who comes a long will have a shot at blowing your mind instead of playing second best to a girl who probably didn't deserve you in the first place. Good luck mate!