The person i'm dating has almost nothing in common with me?

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08-03-12, 01:13 AM
Memeandc

The person i'm dating has almost nothing in common with me?

I'm not going to type some long drawn out thing, Basicly:

She used to be ghetto, She still talks to people who are in gangs, She cares about what everyone thinks, She cares how people see her, she likes all the mainstream music, jersey shore, mtv, spending all her money on getting her nails done and buying cloths. However,

I myself find ghetto people unattracive. I think gangs are retarded, I give no ****s about what people think, and i could care less how people see me. I listen to pretty much metal and GOOD underground rap music, i hate jersey shore (bunch of idiots getting drunk and starting pointless drama) I never watch anything but the history and science channel, I love computers and i build my own, thats pretty much what i spend my money on.

We share almost nothing in common and she flirts with these other *ghetto* guys and idk.. How should i feel about this? is it bad we have nothing in common?
08-03-12, 01:16 AM
Wakeup

Quote:

is it bad we have nothing in common

I dunno? What do you think?
08-03-12, 01:18 AM
Memeandc

Quote:

Originally Posted by Wakeup [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I dunno? What do you think?

If i knew that i wouldn't be asking you.
08-03-12, 01:21 AM
Wakeup

Quote:

Originally Posted by Memeandc [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

If i knew that i wouldn't be asking you.

Well if you want a response without "me" knowing what your actual feelings are for someone that has nothing in common with you or how you get along in general, then my answer (in your case) is Yes, It's "bad" for you to stay with someone you have nothing in common with.
08-03-12, 01:38 AM
HeartIsAching

Quote:

Originally Posted by Memeandc [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

How should i feel about this?

Wrong question. How you should feel about it is irrelevant. You don't have feelings because they're the ones you're supposed to have, you have the feelings you have. The real question here is WHAT you're feeling about this. Do some self-exploration and figure out what it is you feel about it, and what you need to do about it if anything.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Memeandc [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

is it bad we have nothing in common?

Not necessarily, but in your case I'm going to say probably. What are you going to do together? Obviously you're not going to go clothes shopping or watching TV together, and she's not going to want to sit around and hand you machine screws and hard drives. You say she flirts with other guys - is this a boundary issue for you? What do you feel about that? Is it likely to change?
08-03-12, 02:01 AM
Amber2011

You do need to have some things in common. My late husband and I had one thing in common when we first met - we were both taxi drivers. When we had to give that up, we found we had nothing in common anymore and we started drifting apart. A lot of the time we just tolerated each other. We only became close again when he became very ill so, yes, I think it is important to at least have a couple of things in common.
08-03-12, 02:09 AM
Memeandc

Quote:

Originally Posted by HeartIsAching [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Wrong question. How you should feel about it is irrelevant. You don't have feelings because they're the ones you're supposed to have, you have the feelings you have. The real question here is WHAT you're feeling about this. Do some self-exploration and figure out what it is you feel about it, and what you need to do about it if anything.

Not necessarily, but in your case I'm going to say probably. What are you going to do together? Obviously you're not going to go clothes shopping or watching TV together, and she's not going to want to sit around and hand you machine screws and hard drives. You say she flirts with other guys - is this a boundary issue for you? What do you feel about that? Is it likely to change?

She hispanic, And im just your avg white guy. What we do together basicly is hangout and have sex. We don't watch tv because she has ZERO intrest in history and science, and i have ZERO intrest in gwetos getting drunk and fighting each other. We do have issues, she hugs just about every guy shes friends with and even other people notice it. I have cheated on her (only a kiss, which i dont really consider cheating) and we broke up and got back together, saying she would treat me better. i mean theres alot more of the story and i can tell you it if you need the information
08-03-12, 02:52 AM
HeartIsAching

Quote:

Originally Posted by Memeandc [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

She hispanic, And im just your avg white guy. What we do together basicly is hangout and have sex. We don't watch tv because she has ZERO intrest in history and science, and i have ZERO intrest in gwetos getting drunk and fighting each other. We do have issues, she hugs just about every guy shes friends with and even other people notice it. I have cheated on her (only a kiss, which i dont really consider cheating) and we broke up and got back together, saying she would treat me better. i mean theres alot more of the story and i can tell you it if you need the information

No. "We" (you two) don't have an issue - YOU do. If you can't handle her hugging other guys, it's a boundary issue. That's a boundary you can't tolerate being crossed. Have you communicated this to her? If you have and she's still doing it, then you need to assess whether or not you can live with it. She's not going to stop being who she is to suit you, and who she is bothers you. I'm not even going to get into "is it just a hug, and if so what's the problem?" thing. At this point it's not even important.

A kiss is cheating.

Personally I think you'd probably both be better off broken up.