She's Married, I'm Involed - What Did I Get Into?
Hi All,
I just need some thoughts/opinions.
I started a new job. About 2 months ago, I started talking to one of our sales planners. She�s been married for about 2 years. I've been with someone off and on for about 10 years. We connected from the start, and what began as work conversation quickly turned into txting each other pretty regularly. Flirting happened daily, we found ways to see each other outside of work (going to bars, meeting in parking lots, etc. etc.). Quickly a routine formed of calling one another when we left the office for lunch, or talking to one another on the drive home from work. We talked to one another about everything. She would wear things to work that she knew I liked. You guys get it.
About a month into it, we were both falling for one another pretty heavily. We were doing everything we could to talk to one another and spend time around one another. One day, we were talking and having a deep conversation, and she blurted out that she loved me. It took my completely by surprise, and I asked her what she had said. She wouldn�t repeat it. A few days later, we were talking again, but this time, I could tell she was upset. She said she was having a really hard time because she had completely fallen in love with me. I didn�t know what to say, so I said what my gut felt, that I had also fallen in love with her.
Things continued to go along fine, until about a week ago. She has completely turned on a dime, telling me that she needs to figure her stuff out and that she can�t feel pressured to make me happy and talk to me at the level she was. She is the type of person to never say no, so she over-commits herself with work responsibilities and social things � so she is really busy. I can�t let go of the fact that she told me she loved me, and that I told her the same. She�s married, and I have been with someone off and on for 10 years, why would either of us say that?
What do I do? How do I let go of her and stop reliving all the time we shared and the way we talked? Every day I see her at work I get depressed because I know she just wants it to be professional, but all I do is sit in my office looking at my phone to see if the txt light is blinking. The worst part is that is was so abrupt. I know I need to give her space and let her figure her life out, but I can�t. I�m a very indecisive person. I like routine and comfort. And for the first time in my life I considered leaving my girlfriend to be with this girl. I'm completely obsessing. How do I give her what she wants but still make sure she knows how I feel? How can I be sure what she said was true and not just bs?
