help, whats she thinking?
alright, first post for me and i just want to warn you that im a senior in high school, so im sure this is typical high school angst
ok, So I've known this girl for about 7 years, we went to middle school together. Weve been friends, not too close, but we were cool with each other ever since we got into high school. She would always joke about how much she liked me in middle school, blah blah blah
Fast forward to a few months ago. I ask her to a formal and we have a really good time. We are on and off hanging out for a month or two and one night were hanging out at her house with a few friends. They all leave and were just watching TV and i kiss her. The next day i ask her out and she says yes. The relationship as a whole was great. We enjoyed being around each other. We'd fight a little bit sometimes, we both had strong personalities. I'd get pissy because she would cancel because of things she had to do (dance and sports) and she'd get pissy that I didn't show her that I got jealous when she went out of her way to flirt with other guys. She would always tell me how she was so afraid that she'd mess up the relationship and there are so many things wrong that I didn't see with her. I told her that I saw those things but they were just endearing. I really liked her and she had known about my past and how i'd been cheated on and stuff like that, so she knew that i was a bit restrained with my feelings. We had a couple of big fights about nothing, and we had talked about breaking up, but we both agreed that we didnt want that. She would constantly tell me how happy i made her and how i was the best thing to happen to her. I went out of town for a community service thing for a weekend and when i got back, she again cancelled dinner plans, saying that she had forgotten that it was her sisters birthday and that he parents had forgotten as well. I was disappointed but whatever. She invited me over but i told her i was too tired. The next day i decided to let it all go and tell her how i felt about her. I told her how she was important to me and how i loved that she made me feel like i had to be a better person for her and left it on her car. She came home and pretty much said "thats sweet." i didnt think much of it and i asked if she wanted to coem to my game the next day. She came and we went to coffee afterwards, everything seemed fine.
That night she seemed like something was weighing on her and it was really affecting her on aim, so i called her and tried to cheer her up. She proceeded to tell me she is questioning everything in her life, including our relationship. I asked her what that meant, knowing full well that she wanted to break up. When i asked her why, she just said "theres a problem inside of me and i have to be alone right now to solve it." Over the next few days, i tried to ask her why but thats all she gave me, and she got all offended when i told her that she was disrespecting me and our relationship by not giving me so much as a reason. We got into a big fight the week after about the same thing. And 2 weeks after the breakup i asked for my sweatshirt abck and it took me 2 weeks to get it, even when there were many channels to get it back to me, she didnt have to do a single thing except give it to her friend at school. When i got it back, it was soaked in perfume, or at least it smelled up my whole car, adn said she never wore it.
One thing, i asked her about past relationships once, and she said she broke up with her bf of 8 months a while ago "because she was bored" and when i expressed concern about this, she got kind of offended and said "that was 2 years ago, i was 15"
She said she wanted to be friends and all that stuff, but she ignores me everytime i see her. I was walking out of a door and she was standing there with her friend. I waved bye to them both and her friend reached out to give me a hug, and she ran away.
So i was wondering whether anyone had any thoughts on my situation, what shes thinking, what i should do? We have mutual friends and one of them told me she cried after i gave her my letter because she said she felt bad becuase she couldnt reciprocate the feelings i had for her.
EDIT: One incident that i forgot had happened, a few weeks after the breakup her friend and i were in class together, and her friend decides to call my ex from my phone like 3 times. As soon as i get home and sign on to AIM:
Her: Did you call me?
Me: No, that was <name> calling from my phone
Her: Why would she call me?
Me: I dont know, maybe she wanted to talk
Her: I dont believe you
Me: Why would i call you?
Her: Why would she call from your phone?
Me: I dont know, she didnt have hers
Her: Why were you with her?
Me: School
Her: O, ok
