I really need advice.

Hi,

I am after some advice if anyone is able to help.

My partner and i have been having some trouble lately. It first started when i looked at his facebook and there was some mess ages from a girl at his work. I decided to reply and she ended up writing i would love to kiss you right now and dont you see how i look at you at work. She is married and i crumbled. I called him and he went off his head that i replied but said he felt very uncomfortable about what was written. He spoke with her the next day and she said it was for someone else, he said that he gave his log in details to a mate at work and the message was for him.
That was that..

The next thing, which was last week. I was waiting for him to get home from work. I had felt very uncomfortable what had happen with the messages and i started using the find my iphone app. (I know wrong, but i just needed to know the truth if anything was going on)
Well, I sent him a message asking how long he would be and he said a little while, but leaving soon. I than checked the iphone app and it said that he was around the corner at the oval! I jumped in the car and went to look. This was at 2.30 in the morning. Here he was in her car sitting there. I drove in, but felt sick in the stomach and reversed out and went up the street. I than followed the car and he got out of it and went to the house. I followed the car for about 5 mins. I knew it was hers and than turned around and went home.
He denied it all night and morning till lunch time and admitted it was him but said that nothing happened and they were just talking and the reason they were sitting there in the hope i would fall asleep and not see him get out of her car coz apparently he was trying to avoid that .
I said ok. but if anything happens like this again im out.

Friday, I checked the iphone app and it said that he was about half way between his work and here and that he was parked at an industrial section. I sent him a message and said how long would he be. He rang and asked what was going on because i didnt remember him coming home nad getting the car and he said he was off to his brothers to give him a light to work with on his car. We were broke that day and he put the last of his $7 into the car for petrol which was sitting on 0 when i had got home. I said i know your not at your brothers and he said that he was and if i wanted to speak to him. So i said yes and he said ok and than hung up on me and turned the phone off.
He got home about 20 mins later which is how long it would take to get from where he was. He reckons he was around the corner getting petrol when i rang and than came straight back. I am really confused.
I asked him again why he was parked there and he kept denying it. THe app is pretty exact and i dont know what to do now. I went to look at where it was yesterday and the street he was on is land around it with like a colder sack.
He is now angry at me that i was tracking him and has turned it off. we said we would forget what has happened and try again. But i feel like he is betraying me. He said how could he off been there with no petrol in the car....

I really need advice.

Help me please.

If you have to resort to spying and following him, it's time to walk away. No matter whether he's cheating or not - you clearly don't trust him - and without trust, there's no relationship.

I feel you don't trust him at all and it seems you have good reasons for that . I think this kind of relationships is complicated and it makes too much pressure on you . every relationship needs trust and respect ,if you can't find them with this man,it'd be useless for you .. I hope someone will give you a great advice which helps more .. Good Luck.

We have 4 children together. Im really scared. I dont want our relationship to be over. He is a great dad and he does so much for me.

Totally understand what your saying. I never wanted to spy and i know its wrong. I just needed to know the truth. My heart feels like its breaking and ripping into two.