Trying to guage where I am at as well as not make her uncomfortable

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10-12-12, 08:36 AM
chpef480

Trying to guage where I am at as well as not make her uncomfortable

I started going out with this girl almost 2 weeks ago. We have spent a lot of time chatting online and on the phone. We have also gone out a few times. She is really careful about giving out personal information, which I understand, and is alsowanting to take stuff not too far too fast. I am fine with that.

The background is that over the last few weeks we have gone out on 5 dates. The first one was a lunch date, and we got together that night to play pool. We were at the pool hall from 9 till it closed at 2 and then kept talking outside will after 3 AM. The third date she invited me out to grab some dinner and we again, after dinner, talked for a long time. Nothing further happened at this time, mainly because she had been sick as well. Our 4th date I invited her to come to a small house party where my friends were at, we all had a great time and they called the party around 2 AM and she and I went outside, we talked for a second and then started making out till a little after 4. It was a great time. The next day we were supposed to go hiking but due to being out late she was not feeling well so we changed it to a movie and lunch outing instead. I did not want her to think that I was expecting the making out everytime so I did not make a move on her when we were out and about for those few hours.

The point is that I really like this girl, but I want to make sure I do not end up in the friend zone and at the same time I do not want to push something and lose her at the same time. We know a lot about eachother and have a blast when we are together.

At this point I am trying to find a way to make sure we keep the kissing and such as a standard thing, not a 2 hour makeout session, but a sign of affection. From what I put above here does it seem that I would be overstepping any boundries by trying to kiss her when we meet up somewhere? I have been out of the game for a long time so I dont want to mess something up with someone that is special to me.

Any thoughts on this all?

Thanks
10-12-12, 09:49 AM
basilandthyme

Talk with her. Tell her that you're having trouble trying to find the balance between keenness and overstepping the boundary. Ask for her input
10-12-12, 11:15 AM
BackUpOrGetStng

Do not have any type of feelings talk or where you stand or any of that bullshit, or you will without doubt end up in the friendzone. Go for a kiss the next time you hang out with her. If she doesn't go for it, or gives you any type of excuse, stop talking to her and tell her not to contact you unless she wants to date. Your other alternative is to start going out with other girls and stop showing this one so much attention. Either way, you need to cut the amount of attention you give her.
10-12-12, 11:21 AM
BeautifulWife

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Do not have any type of feelings talk or where you stand or any of that bullshit, or you will without doubt end up in the friendzone. Go for a kiss the next time you hang out with her. If she doesn't go for it, or gives you any type of excuse, stop talking to her and tell her not to contact you unless she wants to date. Your other alternative is to start going out with other girls and stop showing this one so much attention. Either way, you need to cut the amount of attention you give her.

Yeah, the old "start seeing other birds" advice, never fails. You should just copy/paste all your posts dude. It's not always the best solution.
10-12-12, 11:26 AM
BackUpOrGetStng

My advice is always(or at least a heavy majority) the best solution in this situation, or any situation where the other person isn't showing much interest. I can't help it if that's what most of the problems on here are. I know from experience that it works. You either get the girl or you're already ahead of the game in moving on, its a win-win.

You should stop being such a cunt and give some advice that you know works.
10-12-12, 11:28 AM
BeautifulWife

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

My advice is always(or at least a heavy majority) the best solution in this situation, or any situation where the other person isn't showing much interest. I can't help it if that's what most of the problems on here are.

You should stop being such a cunt and give some advice that you know works.

So, you think If someone is having problems, the best solution is mostly to find someone else and create new problems? I am a cunt though, you got that right at least. What should I do? Date someone else to stop being a cunt?
10-12-12, 11:38 AM
BackUpOrGetStng

Now you're just being an idiot, and you're putting words in my mouth. This guy has been seeing this girl for 2 weeks. There's no reason to put all his eggs into one basket right now, particularly when he's not sure if his feelings are reciprocated, or to what degree. Becoming needy, and worrying about not screwing up, very often, leads to people screwing up.

Now if you want to give a specific situation with a specific problem then I'll answer your question, but your broad generalizations don't warrant a specific response. To stop being a cunt you should eat glass.
10-12-12, 11:40 AM
BeautifulWife

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Now you're just being an idiot, and you're putting words in my mouth. This guy has been seeing this girl for 2 weeks. There's no reason to put all his eggs into one basket right now, particularly when he's not sure if his feelings are reciprocated, or to what degree. Becoming needy, and worrying about not screwing up, very often, leads to people screwing up.

Now if you want to give a specific situation with a specific problem then I'll answer your question, but your broad generalizations don't warrant a specific response. To stop being a cunt you should eat glass.

I'm yanking your chain bro. Stop being so pissy, I like your work on here.
10-12-12, 11:42 AM
BackUpOrGetStng

WTF? Did you get banned again?

Your first reply raised my eyebrow, but it should've been a dead giveaway.
10-12-12, 11:45 AM
BeautifulWife

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

WTF? Did you get banned again?

Yeah, occupational hazard. thegaymod is really determined to clean the forum up.