Staying single forever for a simple life?

Hi everyone,

Cut a long story short, I was engaged to be married to my girlfriend until it ended just over a year ago. We had bought an apartment together, which we still own and rent out, just to cover the costs until our mortgage agreement ends. This of course means that we still have to maintain some contact for financial reasons, which I feel has contributed in making this whole situation difficult for me.

The impression I get from Facebook is that she is very happy at the moment. She is currently living with the man that she was seeing a lot when she was with me. She always said that nothing was going on between them, but she spoke of him highly when we were together and was getting home late nearly every night. That being the case, I didn't pursue any accusations and when it ended part of me was relieved. I had moved away from all my friends and family and when she said it was over, I was devastated yet at the same time a weight had been lifted.

For the past year I have been back at home with my family, spending a lot of time with my friends and going out every weekend. I am happy with my job which has good future prospects and they are covering the costs for all my education. Even though this is the case, I should point out that I don't ever pursue any relationship.

The reason I don't pursue a relationship is because I don't know what I want. I am attracted to women, but at the same time men, probably more so. I don't know what to do about it. Friends have asked me if I am gay before, which I have ignored and brushed off as a joke. My mother has recently stated the disappointment she would feel if I was gay. I have decided to remain single, for the sake of ease, but sometimes I wonder, is something worth pursing?

Any advice is much appreciated, and sorry for the rambling story. I'm not expecting any miracles and I know this is all down to me :)

Certainly nothing wrong being gay or bi curious. I thought I may have been gay, but I was only attracted to hot anime gays :P I think parents are always a little disappointed if they find out their son/daughter is gay; but as long as they still love, respect, and accept you its alright.

Really though, it's up to you if you want to be with someone. Guy or girl, at least tell the person you are interested in that you may be confused about your sexuality.

Hi everyone,

Thought I would try and resurrect this thread, as I feel like I need to talk to someone.

Does anyone have any further advice on the original post?

Many thanks in advance for any responses and hope everyone had a good winter break!

hmm what a story, well it depends on you. Whichever way you want it be.

Can I ask, how old are you?

My initial response is that why on earth would you want to abandon hope of finding love again? On the plus side, I think that not desperately searching will help you a lot. Just be open to falling in love again. If it happens now or ten years down the road is less important.

And since you are interested in both men and women, that only means that you have twice as many potential candidates :)

As a side note, do you really think your mom would rather see you lonely than with a boyfriend?

For your information Guybrush, I am 24 years old.

Regarding you last question, I honestly don't know.

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Originally Posted by enginex [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

For your information Guybrush, I am 24 years old.

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Too young to give up, I'd say. And why would you?

I agree that you're still young. Most guys I know who are close to your age just want to play around and are not even thinking about finding love yet.

Anyway about feeling unsure if you're straight or gay or bi.... I've had those feelings before too because when a guy starts wanting to make things serious I get turned off and run away. I've noticed that I was attracted to female curves, and I've had a couple dreams about being with girls. However I think it was just a stage of curiosity for me and not yet meeting the right guy. I went through this phase where I kissed girls and even had bi girls hit on me... That's when I realized I didn't swing that way. I've since met guys i was a lot more compatible with and didn't feel turned off by intimacy with them.

Maybe you just need some time to explore?

I think its normal to be confused at first. I knew two gay guys that dated girls before they came out of the closet. I asked one of them and he said he always knew he was gay but was just a bit confused/in denial when he was pursuing this girl in the past.

i agree with guybrush..

you are too young. i would advice you to focus on building up your career first. And luck might be on your side someday during work..you met the girl you like. ;)

Just worry about pursuing your own happiness and not worry what everyone else thinks. It's your life you do what you want.