Stuck in a rut

So first off thanks for reading. Anyway Me and my husband have been together for 5 yrs and have had a very rough road from the beginning. at one time we were so in love and did everything together and had so much fun...had sex all the time and had a good time doing it.
Well I ended up getting pregnant and I know kids change alot but we both had ones from previous. anyway we stopped having sex and when we do its effortless and boring...(I know sounds harsh-I would never tell him these things) We never "hang out" or even have simple conversations. I always feel like I am bothering him or he is annoyed with me. I know I can be nit picky at times but I think I am pretty laid back compared to alot. What I wanna know is how do I put the flame back into our relationship? How do I make him want me not only sexually but mentally?

do you praise him when he does something good or constantly remind him that you find him attractive? Do you wear lingerie at night or throw yourself at him while he's watching TV or doing whatever? Do you ever suggest trying a new position or doing most of the work during sex for a change? Also, has your husband recently gained weight or experienced decreased energy? Is he feeling depressed or having low libido? He may need to get his testosterone levels checked by a doctor

Do YOU want HIM both sexually and mentally? These things tend to work both ways.