Breakup but there's still something... maybe?

So, to start off, I will try to keep it decently brief but it has been several months and trying to work things out. So please bear with me but I am sure this is not all too uncommon.

So my ex and I first met back in the end of August at a car meet I put on. Nothing happened, just casual and such. Three days later I left for Europe for holiday. While away, she was pretty talkative via FB and we exchanged pms every so often while I was busy and such. When I came back we hung out for about a week or so then I ended up asking her out. It started out as a casual talk as I was getting my bearings and seeing how she was feeling, asked her out, and we ended up talking until 4am. Needless to say, all went well. Things were great for a month or so.

Then she had a talk with me saying that it was too much too fast and that she needed some time and such but still wanted to spend time with me and the like but not as serious. It does kinda make sense since there wasnt that much time for the whole dating process before asking her out but we did a lot during the time and much of it was building our relationship by going out and doing stuff that was not just the expected couple thing. She said that if she had a bit more time she wouldn't have seen an issue and such. She said she would even like to see how things were between us in 6 months or a year.

Anyway, we were still really close for the month following. We hung out at least once a week, maybe twice, sent texts, and talked online every so often (various means of talking via the Net). During this time she got in an accident of which I helped her fix her car, then her engine went out on her so I let her borrow my spare car while her's was in the shop, she went through some rough times and almost took up some jobs that would have placed her down a not so great path as she was starting to feel the extreme pressure for needing cash. I helped her through by giving her support and offering alternatives that were just as good and made sure to mention the goals she had so that she didnt lose her focus. She ended up also getting her wisdom teeth removed so helped her get some medication so she could get through the pain and such. During this time both her mom and mom's bf really took to me and like me even to today (something that is nice considering ex's arent usually given an open invitation after a break-up).

Anyway, so we were just friends but still a underlying tension of a relationship. Then the holidays and that became more stress as work, family, and all that good stuff crept into life. Then around Thanksgiving she ended up hooking up with someone. Unfortunately that someone I knew as well so it kinda complicated things. Anyway, she and I hung out a couple times and talked but it lessened a bit and I could tell. I was doing my best to keep it all cool and for the most part my freaking out didnt really get to her for the most part (more elaboration on it in a bit). Beginning of December we were to hang out and she ended up inviting me out with her family instead as plans had changed. So we were still good friends and the family loved me. We were both trying to walk the fine line of not losing the friendship, although it would have been best to simply walked away when we first talked, and such.

Well, the Friday before Xmas I went by the mom's bf's place to drop off the last of some car parts she needed and talked with him. After talking, which by then it is apparent that her parents had fairly recently realized what was going on with the ex and her personal life (couple of weeks previous tone was different regarding me/her). Well, I decided to just let her be and sent her a text saying no need to talk, I already knew (as per me being a bit too talkative/wanting to hang out and to let her just do her thing), and to have a good evening and to have fun. She reply was "Know what?". I just replied, "It's ok. Enjoy your night. It's all good." The following day she was down at her parents and obviously saw that I had dropped off her stuff and sent a text "Why?". I replied that I did not know what she was elaborating to. During this time I decided to play it cool and just let her be. That type of mannerism thing. She continued on about being confused, not understanding, and ended it with the fact she was emotionally conflicted. I replied that I guess we will have to talk about it later but since she was busy to have a good night. Didnt talk to her the following day (although it was hard). She initiated a Merry Xmas Eve text, which I replied. She sent a Merry Xmas text, which I did not reply. Then in the am of Xmas she sent a text asking to come over and spend some time. I said sure to her request and we talked a little. There was some tension but I wasn't sure as to why she was so unsettled by Saturday's text exchange and she didnt want to talk about it. But she left on good terms and gave me a warm hug. Following day I sent her a text about New Years and she said she had made plans (she had referenced it on Xmas but forgot the details) so I let it go. Then a couple of days later I was talking with her and came up that I was wondering how she was doing, hope things were well, and that we hadnt talked for a few days and such. She said that she needed space. It was a bit abrupt. New Year's came and her plans fell through and she was suddenly feeling really bad about herself and from what I could see from FB and other sources she got stood up.

So, I did the no contact for a week. It was during this time I found out about her hook-up with the other guy and the resulting failure of it that happened within a month. She sent me a text on the day we had previous agreed to meet up saying that she would be still be free but understood if I never wanted to see her again. I said, I dont know what you're talking about but nothing you did was incorrect or something you didnt have a right to. She replied that she knew I knew. She felt really bad for she knew how I felt about her. She wanted me as a friend and loved to talk and hang out with me and didnt want to lose that. I said I had no problem with what she did and was open to hanging out as we had planned. So she came over and all was great. We talked about things. It was a little tense but in the end, we were really close, held each other and she almost cried several times (one time I held her as she teared up). She even apologized as to not telling me sooner and said she had been feeling really guilty and needed the time to gather herself from the previous instance and how to talk to me. But it was clearly visible she was unhappy and possibly (trying not to assume) scared and disappointed in herself. Then later in the evening when I had a little too much to drink and kinda broke down. My stamina had failed me and she left. I remember her saying that she couldnt stay and still be friends and could tell that she was tearing up as well.

The next day I woke up and didnt remember much of what was said to the specifics and knew that the way things were left wasnt good so asked if she could come over in the following days. She said sure and said the next day and was there before I even woke. We talked and she was tense but we sorted things out to an extent and I expressed how I was worried about her, understood what/why she did and forgave her, said to just be careful and to try to stop her habit of being used, and even asked as to why she wanted me so badly in her life. She said that she had no friends and those she had were always with their bf's (she began to cry so I held her for a little then gave her space), I was one of the only if not the only true friend she could count on (as per being truthful and not expecting anything from her), that I had become such a big part of her life in such a short period of time that she couldnt see the future without me in some way, and that she didnt want to lose me.

Well that was all last week that we talked and stuff. I told her that I would give her space and not text so much and let her be for a bit. Well, ended up texting more than I expected. Various reasons (such as sending her a short but supportive good luck text about her new job she started) but by Monday I realized that it was far too much (not many but just about every day since) and that here answers were getting shorter each day so I let off yesterday. I didnt contact her and when she commented on my posts on FB I was short in return.

So my plan is to get myself together as I have been trying so hard to do. Renew confidence in myself. Show her the fun times we had and build our friendship. All the while live life.

So, I sent her a text today asking if she was free this afternoon or two days next week. She said she was busy today but would be able to do one of the days next week :) and asked what I had in mind. I replied going to a bookstore (we both loved that and did it once and was surprised how much she took to it) and depending on the time grabbing some food. This would likely entail us walking around downtown and such. Just good fun that was not pressured by a relationship. I figure I'll give it a bit to figure out the details... likely tomorrow or late tonight.

So my question is, does one actually see potential? We have been through so much and I feel there is a connection at some point. My problem that she told me the last time we talked was that when we were together it became too much. It wasnt that she didnt like me over at her place or going out, it was just that before either of us knew it, we were literally with each other every day and it got to her faster than it did me, although I know I was getting tired because I felt I was the one having to figure things out and make sure that fitting. In short, we both got caught up and very much so. So the only thing that is wrong with me is that I need to give more space and just let things happen. Not be so proactive, which is odd for everything else in life to be successful one must be quite proactive. But if things begin slow and we do the whole friendship thing, give her time and space, make her laugh again (managed both times last week even while it was tense to make her smile and laugh the first time and chuckle the second), and just relax.

But my question is after a few times as we get closer and better friends again (may take a month I am thinking of talking and hanging out), should I continue or should I lessen contact or no contact/barely any contact for a couple of weeks to let her suddenly feel that I am no longer there and that after rekindling our relationship that I have possibly looked further?

You can ask as to why I want to be with her so much. Well, her mum and mum's bf were very supportive and liked the two of us (plus). We mesh so well together that it is easier to ask what we dont have in common or dislike than to ask what it is we do (I have yet to find a girl who meshes so well), and in many ways, despite being so complimentary, our backgrounds and outlook on life are completely opposite that we compliment each other stupidly well. In short, our chemistry is very well suited and through everything, we still have hung on to each other, supported each other, and still care for each other. I would like to give it a try. The raw emotions have faded so that helps with the rebooting of "us" so that we can start off right and healthy.

My apologies, this turned out to be much longer.