she was angry, needing space, but contacted me after 1 week NC
ok this is a long story i guess so i just try to start from the beginning.
my last girlfriend suddenly dropped me out of her life from 1 day to another, which left me really heartbroken and confused. i tried talking to her, but she just kept ignoring me.
i just wanted a last talk and the reasons as we never had a fight really. the only times was when i got a little jealous as she had many male frinds she was flirting with online on facebook.
it was long distance so i had no chance to see her. anyways i got really desperate in the end and wrote message after message and it took me a few months to get over it.
at the end i met a new girl and we instantly connected. i know her from when we were children, but haven't seen her in like 12 years. we started to talk on facebook and suddenly ended up talking for 7 to 12 hours and that every few days. then we finally met and after like 2-3 dates started to kiss and cuddle, after a few more dates she started sleeping at my place and all went well. we have lots in common and never had an awkward silence or something like that, was always just fun and we both really enjoyed the time. we met every few days for the last 2 months and most of the time she would stay at my place. we got really close and cuddled most of the time for hours watching tv, talking and getting more intimate. she also told her parents about me (she's 27 just for the record) and that she possibly has a new boyfriend, so it was like we'd work on getting into a serious relationship.
well in the beginning there was 1 time when i got a little upset as on a weekend she said she would come to my place saturday. she went out on friday, but told me she would go home early..later she told me she got really drunk and partied till 12 am and slept at a friends place. then at saturday night she was too wasted to come over so i got a little upset, but wasnt really like a big fight or something. just said i was a bit disappointed and i got a little jealous as she slept at some guys place (not alone there were other friends too). later i found out its a gay friend of her's so i felt bad and said sorry the next day for being such an idiot. so all was fine again. i told her that because of my last relationship i'm a bit overly sensitive with being jealous, but i try to work on it. i just told her so she would understand that i really try to get this jealousy shit out of my head, as i was never like that before..just the last relationship i mentioned on the top messed me up a bit. however after that i started to trust her more and told her that as the way she reacted told me she isn't a girl who would just have fun with any guy. ..so well everything was fine again we continued to see eachother and it was all good. after a while i told her i'd like to be in a relationship with her, then she acted a bit wierd said she can't because of her friends. for the record, her friends are also friends of her ex boyfriend which she broke up with 5 months ago. they noticed she was seeing me and told her that its not ok or something, which kinda upset me. i mean 5 months later she cant have a new bf?? and why is it their business anyways ? well we had an argument and i overreacted a little saying shit like "ok then we can stop seeing eachother, whats the use if you don't want to be in a relationship" or when she said she needs time to decide i was like "ok so you think i'm gonna sit here and wait 3 months for you?" i know that was stupid, but well you say stupid things in arguments... and she told me i didnt understand her right and she doesnt care what the friends say. so i noticed its just a hard situation for her currently and she doesnt know what todo, so i felt bad again and said sorry for acting up and that i would understand it. so was only 1 day and the next we sorted it out again. she also said she needs time to decide, so i told her she can have all the time she needs. well we went out a few more weeks from that point until around 2 weeks ago we planned to meet on sunday night and on saturday she told me friends asked if she wants to go out, but she wouldnt go as it would just end bad (as in, with too much alcohol), besides she was out friday already. so i made a stupid comment, but ment it as fun, not totally serious ..i said something like "yea better stay at home or else you'll stood me up again, or they mess you up ;)" ..i realize it was inapropriate. so she stayed at home as her brother had to install her new kitchen anyways the next day. well the next day her brother messed up and it was all chaos so she said she cant come. i just sad "oh too bad, then good luck!" ..later that evening i went into facebook for a minute and left. that moment she must have written me something as when i logged in again i had 2 messages the 1st being all polite and the 2nd like "why did you just leave, thats really immature of you but ok.." so i called her up and said whats going on? why shes upset.. then she said "because you just left and the mail you sent when i told you i cant come wasnt so cool either.." well ever since that day i cant reach her as shes so angry. for the next week we just talked a little via sms and when i asked her to meet up she brought up excuses. so at some point i called her and asked whats up and she got really upset and angry. haven't seen her like that before. i mean really angry only shouting at me, telling me she doesn't want a relationship and that i know everything better. so i figured i write her my feelings in a mail. so i just wrote stuff like that i'm sorry i was jealous and i really understand why that upset her and i hope we can talk about it in person. well then we had another phone call and she said she doesnt want to see me as i just want to persuader her into something or pressure her, besides she has to sort her life and needs to focus on that, sorry has nothing todo with me, she said (for the record: she just moved to a new place that she doesnt like and was looking for new work which also pissed her off, so generally in bad mood with her current life..). i said no i just want to see what happens when we meet eachother to maybe get the tension out of the way as via text its not really working out and easily to miss the point. well she was so angry and shouting i couldnt talk normally to her anymore, so on a friday i wrote 1 mail, basically saying i miss her and trying to see if it really doesnt mean anything to her anymore (the time we spent) and what her feelings were. well she didnt reply. the next day (saturday night) i wrote her a little text message on her mobile like "whatever you do rightnow, i hope you are alright, miss you!" ..no reply. then on monday i wrote a similar mail like friday asking her stuff like if that all doesnt mean anything to her and if she really cant give me a 2nd chance to date blah blah and asking to meet one last time atleast, if she decides she really has no feelings anymore then i'd give up. well she wrote back saying something like "i have to focus on work now then i can say more. sorry but nothing has changed relationship no, friendship yes. i don't say anything against a 2nd chance, everybody in deserves that..but i tell you rightnow directly whats up and i need time to forget about what happened". well i wrote back and still said i'd like to meet up just so the tension might be gone..yes i know i was acting desperate. well a day later i wrote ok forget about it, we don't have to meet up and then continued to ask about her feelings and stuff which she never answered really. then she just replied if i would have understood her last message properly, its that shes busy with work and cant meet, besides she doesnt think a meeting would be ok rightnow as i would just continue to pressure her into a relationship. which i didnt intent really. ok so after that i tried to explain once more why i want to meet, that i just want to talk one last time in person and so on ..well when she ignored that again i said ok fine i see that i have no chance with you anymore, i'll give up and leave you alone. then i aslo said i would delete her from facebook and skype for now, to make it easier for me to forget her and not get tempted to write her and continue to annoy her with my mails. then she replyed really angry saying "you annoy me with those "i am sorry" mails, they really piss me off and i see that you don't get it. i know you are sorry and i just need time. but yea delete me thats the best, you seem to have psychological issues. those mails where you say 1000 times you are sorry and your shit that what we had doesn't mean anything to me, you are sooo dumb.. i'm sick of it, but you always know better how others feel, you genius. just stop that shit, you don't know how other people feel. bye" ..i had deleted her off my friendslist on facebook and after that mail she set me on complete ignore so i wouldnt be able to write back. so i called her up trying to explain, that i didn't delete her because i was mad, just to make it easier for me to leave her alone and that i wouldnt see her all the time. no chance to talk properly she was just shouting and angry and whenever i started a sentence with "i know" she started with "yea yea you know, you know everything better". couldnt get any answers, just had to take her shit as i didnt want to fight back and get angry too, i tried to have a mature conversation and its no use if i start to get upset too, besides she would hang up which she later did anyways. well i never said i would know what she feels. i just tried to find out, but she didn't give me any answers on her feelings. so in the end yea i said "ok i see it all doesn't mean anything to you" stuff like that, but doesnt it look like it ? well so after she hung up on me i decided to go on no contact and leave her alone as afterall she bitched that i wouldnt give her space. like 2 days later i saw that she unignored me on facebook and added me in skype again. i didn't talk to her and just waited. exactly 1 week later she suddenly messages me in skype like "hello :) how are you doing?" at like 11:30pm ..i started a normal conversation with her, not bringing up any of the old stuff and we talked for around 1 hour. i added her back as friend in facebook the next day and she accepted, but she didnt message me when she went online. that was this friday. on saturday i wrote her that i had to think of her and just wanted to check if she has a nice day. didnt reply, but today i saw she posted on facebook that she's sick since yesterday, so i wrote her on skype saying hope shes alright and asking what she has etc. turns out she cant stand up and is really sick with her stomach, cant eat etc..
well so here is my question: do you guys think she wrote me exactly 1 week after i went with no contact, because she misses me, or was it just out of curiosity?
also is there hope i could get a 2nd chance with her to go out dating again, or did i mess up completely ?
since i am near her house tomorrow, i wanted to ask her if i can stop by and bring her some groceries as she said she didnt eat since friday. she didnt buy anything and cant walk anyways.
i wanted to say that i bring some stuff over if its ok and i would also not stay for too long in case she doesnt want company.. is that a good or bad idea?
i mean she is angry and then she contacts me so soon again..if she would be over me, wouldnt she just stop caring? well she said she needs time as i hurt her (as when i was jealous it made her feel i see her as some party bitch). but honestly i don't understand why she's so angry about it that she totally refuses to talk and seems to completely give up. yet she writes me 1 week later as if nothing happened. i just wonder if i should try to reach her again and meet or just give up. i really thought about it clearly and i don't want to give up if there is a chance. since we got along great and i really dont understand where this anger is coming from. i feel like it could all work out again, but of course i don't know how she feels, besides she didn't tell me what she really feels. just that i don't understand it what she feels :P oh and one more thing she said i don't really know her, how can i like her so much? ..i mean what?! we've been sleeping together and stuff..of course i dont know her entire life story, but is that needed before you can fall in love with someone ? oh also forgot to mention i told her that first time that i love her while we had this argument. before that, when all was fine i just told her i start to fall in love with her, but never said it, so i just thought at one point maybe that helps to reach her..
sorry for the mess hope someone can give me some advice, thanks in advance!! :)
i'm really desperate i know :P oh and i'm piescies and she is capricorn if that matters to anyone lol
