Struggling to cope, ashamed of myself

I'm in a real bad place in my life at the moment. I have the feeling my partner maybe cheating on me. Over the last 4 months my fiancée has started to spend all her time out of the house working or with friends. However when home I'm now ignored constantly while she is on her phone all night. I've let her know how I feel and I just get told that I'm stupid and pathetic. I love her with all my heart but I lashed out when she came home at 5:30am after a night out hitting her on her bum. I regret this totally and realise I have issues with my emotions and controlling them while my life is like this. One minute I feel angry the next I'm almost in tears. We have 2 children and they fortunately have not noticed this yet. I love her too much to leave but now don't know what to do as feel my life is at a major hard point and I'm struggling to cope

Relationship counselling might be your best option.

Appreciate ur advice, however my partner is very much a sinic when it comes to any type of counselling thinks its ridiculous and people that use them are pathetic. I'm willing to try anything but I believe I know what the answer would be if I suggested this

If she won't do counselling, what's her solution to the problem?

Gotta say though, it sounds like she has zero respect for you. In all seriousness, I have to ask "does she still want to be married to you?"

That again is something I have asked and have offered to leave, however each time she tries to reassure me nothing is going on stop over reacting and it will sort itself out over time. However like I say 4 months later and its still no better. Starting to think its time to move on but will be devastated to leave my kids as well as her.

There's a problem and she's not prepared to really deal with it is she? So the relationship is as good as over. Sounds like she's emotionally left the relationship already. So accept that it's over and work out what YOU want from here onwards.

Go to counselling alone; that'll help you make sense of your situation and your emotions. At the very least, it'll help to just talk to someone who doesn't call you pathetic.

This woman does not respect you!