hello everyone. sort of dazed and confused as far as relationships go....
Hey everyone, Im glad I found this forum. I have been hanging around reading posts and theres alot of good perspectives here :) I have been pretty confused lately, lots of relationship ups and downs for the past couple years. Im single right now, 30 years old. I was married for 6 years to a decent girl (for most of it) but it went downhill quickly after one day out of the blue she said she was bored and wanted an open relationship.
I was a nieve 24 year old so I said OK we can try that. (not a good idea) Basically she screwed around with other guys and I never did anything with another woman because it felt wrong. I even set up a three way with one of my good friends because it was one of her "fantasies" and she said she would do the same for me but never did. (he is still one of my good friends, that didnt come between us, he is a good guy) So finally I said ok, you've had your fun, no more open relationship.
About 6 months later I found out she was sleeping with one of her co-workers and told her to stop and I would forget it ever happened. She said she couldnt do that and told me she wanted a divorce. That was when I was 28.
I was single for about 6 months and then met a nice girl at work who, after a couple months, became my girlfriend.
Things went good for 6 or 8 months but I could tell she kept getting more and more high strung. by about the middle of last summer, soon after she had moved in with me, she became the full blown insecure, controlling, jealous, name calling type. I tried everything to make her happy again and even tried to change myself and conform to everything she wanted.
She would get mad at me if I wanted to hang out with my friends even once a month, even though I spent all my free time with her. Also after she moved in she stopped having sex with me except for 1-2 times a month, whereas earlier in the relationship she said she loved it and we did it 5-6 times a week, which is awesome, but just 2 times a week would have made me more than happy. Im a nice clean, in shape, attractive guy so I dont know why she didnt want to. I tried being romantic and everything a guy can think of to increase attraction but it didnt work.
So I finally broke up with her at the end of Feb. 2013. I felt like the biggest guilty @sshole in the world because she has a 6 year old son and she lived with me and I didnt want to have to make them leave, but at the same time she brought that on herself by acting like a immature spoiled brat and being completely unnappreciative of everything I did for her.
She stayed at my place and finally moved out at the end of june. I have seen her a couple times and she says she is "SO happy" being on her own with her new place, but that it wasnt my fault she was the way she was, she said she isnt good in relationships.
So Im pretty confused and a little cynical right now lol. Im taking some time to get my life straight after back to back failed relationships, but I do want to learn about relationship stuff and maybe meet some new women for some casual dates and hopefully convince myself that all women arent like the last two I have been involved with, because my brain knows that most women arent that way, but my heart doesnt. (kinda corny, I know lol)
Im also a kinda shy introverted type, with a small circle of friends, and Im a little awkward around any woman Im interesten in, so Im not very good at meeting women. I need to work on that :)
Sorry for the "life story" sized post. Thanks for reading :)
