Want to break up with my boyfriend... BUT.

I've been going out with my boyfriend for 6months ish and to put it quite bluntly I'm bored. I don't look forward to seeing him anymore, there's not any chemistry left and although we have things in common he's just too much of a 'nice' boy for me.

I am quite opinionated and like discussing current affairs, controversial issues, politics, etc and he doesn't have opinions on things and just seems to accept everything I say... now I know it sounds odd, but I crave an argument, just anything to show a bit of passion.

He was a virgin when I met him, and I was his first girlfriend, so this makes it even harder to break up with him, and I've tried before, but felt guilty so always have got back with him...

Anyway, it's the summer holidays, and I don't know how to break up with him, because he lives a few hours away, but I don't want to be the bitch who breaks up with him on facebook/via text. At the same time, I don't want him to drive down here only to be driving back again...

So I have no idea what to do, and how to do it... I know I need/want to because I need to work on myself and concentrate on uni this year, so help!? :(

Also, I find it difficult to keep in contact with him everyday in the summer, and don't have the motivation, because I'm forever thinking about breaking up with him...

What if you went there to see him? I understand what you're feeling, and while that spark from the beginning SHOULD wear off a bit, the fact that you don't even look forward to seeing him, says a lot! I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half, and I still look forward to seeing him every time we are apart. And we live together! If you were to go there to see him, that might be the best. But do it soon, before both of you get more invested. The longer you wait, the more it will suck.

How about just calling him and telling him what you feel, i.e. that you don't feel you're as compatible as you once thought you were. It doesn't make you a bitch to call him given the geography of your situation.

If i were you ill will just travel to his house or meet up somewhere instead of doing it buy text or phone so you can break up properly and talk it out properly.
It will show you respect him; if you did it by phone that wont be very nice in my opinion.

A breakup is a breakup. People say "Oh, you should do it in person", but in reality it doesn't matter. He is going to hurt, and it won't be because you chose to do it over the phone. How often to you hear someone who was heartbroken say "I would have been fine with it if he/she did it in person, but they did it over the phone!". Never. The heart will break, or it won't. The means of communication is irrelevant.

Plus, if you do it over the phone, then you don't risk the chance of being sucked back in by an emotional breakdown. You do it, talk for a few minutes, say "Its been a slice.", and you hang up. I've been dumped all sorts of ways, and in the end, the message made the impact, not the method of delivery.

Call him on the phone. Then send an email with what you told told us here....simple.

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Originally Posted by anonymous_a [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

What if you went there to see him? I understand what you're feeling, and while that spark from the beginning SHOULD wear off a bit, the fact that you don't even look forward to seeing him, says a lot! I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half, and I still look forward to seeing him every time we are apart. And we live together! If you were to go there to see him, that might be the best. But do it soon, before both of you get more invested. The longer you wait, the more it will suck.

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Originally Posted by Nice [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

If i were you ill will just travel to his house or meet up somewhere instead of doing it buy text or phone so you can break up properly and talk it out properly.
It will show you respect him; if you did it by phone that wont be very nice in my opinion.

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It may not be very nice, but it's the best way to do it, because if I try and do it face-to-face then I know I will crumble & stay with him. I need to do it, and I need some time after to be able to not talk to him.

I just did it via skype.

I appreciate that doing it this way was probably a little harsh and cowardly, but given the circumstances, I think it's acceptable :(

Felt absolutely awful, he was crying and made me feel worse, but it's gotta be done sometimes, it's life and life is cruel.

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Originally Posted by WildOne. [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I just did it via skype.

I appreciate that doing it this way was probably a little harsh and cowardly, but given the circumstances, I think it's acceptable :(

Felt absolutely awful, he was crying and made me feel worse, but it's gotta be done sometimes, it's life and life is cruel.

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That is rather cowardly and disrespectful, isn't it? The fact that sometimes life is cruel shouldn't be license to not show deserving others a little respect and dignity in already quite humiliating circumstances. Skype, for Christ's sake...

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Originally Posted by Nice [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

That is rather cowardly and disrespectful, isn't it? The fact that sometimes life is cruel shouldn't be license to not show deserving others a little respect and dignity in already quite humiliating circumstances. Skype, for Christ's sake...

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The situation is difficult and complicated.

I didn't want to force him to drive for 2 hours just to go home upset.
I didn't want to leave it til September when I'm back at university because that's just leading him on...

What was I meant to do? You tell me.

Given long distance, Skype was probably as good as it gets.

You were honest with him; yes he'll be hurt but these things happen. Not every relationship is going to be 'forever' - you probably had good intentions, then it fizzled out, you found him boring/incompatible and now you've broken up. Simple.

Don't beat yourself up about it, it was a difficult situation and you did what you had to do, given the circumstances. You'll be much happier this way.

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Originally Posted by WildOne. [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I've been going out with my boyfriend for 6months ish and to put it quite bluntly I'm bored. I don't look forward to seeing him anymore, there's not any chemistry left and although we have things in common he's just too much of a 'nice' boy for me.

I am quite opinionated and like discussing current affairs, controversial issues, politics, etc and he doesn't have opinions on things and just seems to accept everything I say... now I know it sounds odd, but I crave an argument, just anything to show a bit of passion.

He was a virgin when I met him, and I was his first girlfriend, so this makes it even harder to break up with him, and I've tried before, but felt guilty so always have got back with him...

Anyway, it's the summer holidays, and I don't know how to break up with him, because he lives a few hours away, but I don't want to be the bitch who breaks up with him on facebook/via text. At the same time, I don't want him to drive down here only to be driving back again...

So I have no idea what to do, and how to do it... I know I need/want to because I need to work on myself and concentrate on uni this year, so help!? :(

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Pick up your phone and call him. Duh.

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Originally Posted by Nice [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

That is rather cowardly and disrespectful, isn't it? The fact that sometimes life is cruel shouldn't be license to not show deserving others a little respect and dignity in already quite humiliating circumstances. Skype, for Christ's sake...

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Chill man, she ended a teenage relationship not brought an end to a marriage, left the guy with the children and ran off with a lover.