Ways of finding a real "friend with bennies" that is not a skank?

Probably most women would say that all does not fit in once sentence but I know back in my 20s, I had a few good friends that were just that.

I am have been in a long term relationship with my partner for 12yrs. Not married, she does not hardly put out at all despite all my extra efforts to please her. I have told her I need more and willing to suit her needs so I can be happy. I am now ready to cheat. I have told her I will do that. It does not really bother her. I don;t think she has a libido.


Problem is I am now 35yo, not in my 20s. All the hotties are taken. I also have NO IDEA where I am supposed to meet someone? Bars are just a place to get a DUI anymore. All my friends are married, no wing man... I have posted some online but either attract obese women or otherwise, wrong for me.

I am 6ft, 200, bach degree, home owner, father, etc. All around, marriage material IMO but I apparently picked the wrong person for me. I really just want a play mate right now.

I know this isn't the advice you are wanting.

Does your partner agree with you taking a mistress? If not - or if you're doing it secretly - she really needs to know that you not having your needs met is making you feel like this. Having said that, she needs to realise that the relationship is at crisis point.

Get yourselves into marriage counselling pronto. Or end the relationship. If you're good marriage material, you shouldn't struggle to find a new partner.

Why don't you just break it off and find someone more sexually compatible? If she finds out you cheated, which normally does happen eventually, you'll have caused a lot of hurt and resentment.

Being 26, I'd consider growing up man and perhaps going to like a singles group, whether it be church, online meeting, etc. There are plenty of women looking for marriage at your age. I doubt however, that women are still looking for just casual sex, it's very rare unless you hit up a club where 40 year olds hang.

Just break up with her. Find a woman you are compatable with. The answer is f**king simple.

if your not happy, fix it. If you cant fix it LEAVE.. Cheating solves nothing and should never be an option.

Ask her if she's okay with you finding your sex elsewhere as long as you keep it sex only and no dating or courting or sleeping over or doing any bonding rituals with your lover. If she's okay with that then join an Adult dating site and away yee go.

If she doesn't want you doing that then suggest couples councelling to see if you can get back the disconnect, failing that... it sounds like its time to break up and start all over as a single dude.

It's simple.....there are dating sites for cheaters. You go out on a date, check them out and decide if you want to take it to the next level. At least the both of you are equally in serious relationships and are on the same page that this is just for sex. A friend of ours had pretty good success going that route. Hope this works for you.