She's "not ready for a relationship". Excuse or Genuine Reason? (Long Story)
Okay so I have known this girl from my social circle for about 4 months now (first year uni students), but have only really started talking to her for the last month or so. We get along quite well and have a lot in common. I adore her, and my friends started to suspect this.
Anyway we were both at a mutual friends party and became somewhat intoxicated (not like, lose all control drunk, but enough to abolish a considerable chunk of any social anxiety) and so did my friends. Well they did some meddling and put us both on the spot about how we felt about each other... anyway long story short, we ended up making out and cuddling for the rest of the night.
She was very self concious, and no matter how much I told her that she was gorgeous, pretty etc she wouldn't believe it. She couldn't understand why anyone would be attracted to her like this and that makes no sense to me because she is amazing in every way imaginable, inside and out (and I made sure to make this clear). She was saying things to the tune of "I hope that I am good enough for you". She did also at one point say that she hoped things work out between us.
Anyway, next morning she leaves quite abruptly. It was obvious that she either didn't know how to handle the situation (which admittedly, I didn't really either) or felt uncomfortable and just bailed.
She avoided me for the rest of the day as well as most of the next until I finally managed to talk to her through facebook chat (which wasn't my ideal option to talk about this sort of thing I know, but it was all I could manage under the circumstances... I didn't want to leave it without saying anything for several days before I saw her in person again). She told me that I am amazing, clever, funny, sweet, and a person she knew she wanted to be around since the day we met etc... but then she says that she just wants me as a friend, and that she "doesn't want anything more than friends right now".
I don't think that she regrets that night though. She told me that she never thought that anyone could ever see her in that way, and that it means more to her than she could ever explain. I told her to never doubt that she is beautiful, and she said that maybe one day she will believe it thanks to me.
I asked her if she felt like I took advantage of her and she said no, but that she felt like she took advantage of me... She also told me that she wasn't actually that drunk and that it wasn't a situation where it could have been anyone, and that if it were anyone but me that nothing would have happened.
This was also the first time that either of has have ever done anything like this. It was both of our first kisses, first time dealing with any of these emotions and experiences.
Has she stuck me in the friend-zone because she is not attracted to me and is using the "I'm not ready" approach to avoid hurting my feelings? Or is she just genuinely not ready for a relationship and would maybe consider one with me once she is? I truly hope for the latter, but I have come to learn that hope can be a cruel crutch to lean on. Hope drives us, but false hope can be a dangerous thing.
Please help me out. Any opinions or tips on my situation, or on what to do now would be hugely appreciated. I do plan to ask her in person how she truly feels eventually (unless you think that would be a bad idea), but I would like a little bit of help understanding my situation before I do that.
Thanks for reading.
