Second Chance...not working in my case :((
You know what? I'm just pissed off. I feel like I've bent over backwards for someone I love. I've supported, forgiven, left and given a second chance. No...there's no more rampant verbal abuse in our relationship as there was before I left him, but damn...there are non-verbal cues that I can't ignore. We're in the middle of a movie, he makes fun of something dear to me (my piano skills), I shut down a little because I'm hurt about it, I start to tell him that what he said upset me, he cuts me off and he says I'm being stupid (yes, verbal abuse, okay), shuts down the latptop (where we were watching a movie), says he sick of me taking things personally, gives me the dirtiest of looks, then turns off the light and turns his back on me claiming it's 2am and he's suddenly tired.
I'm sitting there stunned...like wtf just happened here??? He just totally made fun of my piano playing and somehow I'm in the wrong because it hurt my feelings? This whole incident happened over a 2 minute period. I'm in his living room now, ready to go back to my place, but eff...I'm a good person for eff's sake. I know not every relationship will work out, but I really do (honestly) fail to see my part in making him angry like this. It's so frustrating and hurtful, I'm really a sweet person, never swear at him, always supportive, accommodating (doormatish) and he lashes out. It's tiring and I think I'm done now.
Everyone reaches their breaking point. I never thought I'd feel hatred for him and it's devastating, I'm so, so sad as I type this. I know many will say I'm better off, but you know, the feelings are terribly raw at the moment. I know what's best for me, I just really hate him for forcing my hand like this.