I'm really unsure what to do?
So, about a year ago I met this girl. She was a friend of some of my friends.
The next day i added her to facebook like you do, and sent her a message. We chatted for a bit then swapped numbers. From that day we carried on texting for a while and then bumped into each other on a night out a couple of weeks later. Her friends were going home so i said she could stay with me and my friends, we had a drink and then decided to go home - She lived just round the corner from me and we decided to just go back ot hers for a bit. Nothing happened, just cuddling and kissing. She told me she had a little girl (I obviously knew anyway from facebook) and I said that didn't really bother me.
After this, things were going really well. We went out for a meal and cinema and them from here we went out about 5 or 6 more times over the next few months. We never really went any further than cuddling and kissing other than the odd bits of touchy feely as she wanted to wait - I was happy to respect this decision.
As time went on we got closer, we'd talk all day every day. Her Mum then got a new job and not finishing untill late, which meant us seeing each other got difficult. She didn't want to go too fast and didn't want to get her child involved just yet - Again, I totally respect that decision. She's a single Mum, the father want's nothing to do with the child so she's obviously going to be a bit frightened.
Anyway, things then starts to go a bit downhill, we still talked all day everyday but we never saw each other. I started to get a little bit fed up of not been able to see her, but carried on trying to make things work. But after a while I decide to ask her what's going on with us... Where she see's us and what she wants.
The reply was, well not what I wanted. She basically said she doesn't know what she wants, all she's ever thought about is her and her daughter (Again, understandable), since she had her she's not even wanted a relationship and she never intended on falling for someone (Me). She's not ready to commit to someone and she's afraid of getting hurt again.
So she basically said "I think we should just be friends. I don't want to string you along it's not fair"
In my head I know what she's done is right, her daughter will ALWAYS come first, I'd even make sure of that. But things were going really well, we clicked instantly - Barring in mind the night I met her it was at a friends house, about 3am and we instantly got on well from that night. So obviously I have a lot of feelings for this girl, after about a year of us talking, dating and been close I can't suddenly "just be friends", carry on as normal texting every day and stuff, it's kinda messed with my head a bit. So I basically told her we should maybe have some space, mainly so I can sort my head out really.
So now, here I am. We aint speaking much, she's initiated first contact. First a couple of days later saying she thought I'd have text her by now with a sad face. Then we had a bit of a rant again and she just said "Sorry, i shouldnt have text, i'll let you have more time"
Then 3 days later she text asking how I am. Was a quick convo really, then she got a bit peeved off when I said I don't know what to say.
I just really don't know what to do, and I don't really know what she's thinking.
"I do really like you" and "I know I will regret this" are some of the things she's said - But it's easy to say things to people and not really mean then... Just say them to make people feel a bit better at a time like this. I've done it myself so i know how easy it is to say them!
It's really hard to move on, it's really hard to let her go. I know deep down I need to move on now, but I also think to myself "What if she's now realised how much she likes me and is waiting for me to try again" but I'm scared of clinging on only for it to go horribly wrong.
Sorry for the big post and I hope it makes sense. I tend to ramble a lot when i let things off my chest.
