Girl I have been talking to has suddenly gone cold...help?

Printable View

Show 40 post(s) from this thread on one page

17-12-13, 01:05 PM
southerngreek

Girl I have been talking to has suddenly gone cold...help?

Hi all,

I met a girl about a month ago through a mutual friend and exchanged numbers right before my law school exam study period began. We started talking and texting daily while I was studying and meeting with my group, but I didn't see her. I had no time to do anything, but I always apologized.
Eventually, she threatened to stop talking to me if I didn't meet up with her, so I finally agreed to it. When I met her, she was hammered drunk and I took her home. She eventually started making out with me and we nearly had sex, but I stopped because she was so drunk that I didn't feel comfortable doing it with her.
The next morning, she texted me apologizing and saying she isn't normally like that and that she didn't remember much of anything. I told her not to worry and I had fun, and she invited me over to watch football with her that day. I had an hour break so I did. We sat together on the couch and chatted, etc. then I left to study. I asked her if she wanted to hang out after my exams were over and I actually had time, and she said yes.

I called her to make plans and she informed me she had a friend coming to town this weekend but she'd probably have time to have out before she left on the 18th to go home for Christmas. I said great and we'd play it by ear. I called her last night and asked her if she was free and she said her friend was going to be in town until she left and we couldn't see each other...she's been checking in on Facebook all weekend with only her town friends so I'm not sure this friend exists...

Anyway, is my best course just to leave her alone and wait? Or just cut her out because it's obvious she isn't interested anymore? She's gone till January, so I'm either going to wait until next year or just block her on Facebook and phone number and move on. She keeps saying she wants to hang out again but her actions don't indicate it. I wish she'd just tell me to stop bothering her if that's what she wants. I'm trying to make up for being so busy early but now that I have time to hang out, she doesn't seem interested. She isn't texting me daily and is short with her responses. Maybe she does have a friend here and she's busy but I don't know.
17-12-13, 01:11 PM
BackUpOrGetStng

You took too long and it doesn't seem like you showed much interest to begin with. She lost interest.
17-12-13, 01:14 PM
violet11

Woah - hold up there Mr.Defensive. Block her on FB? Constantly check her page to see who she's hanging with?

Bear in mind that you were really busy and didnt have time for her before this - she could think that she messed up and you're not interested. Or, she's not interested. Either way, you don't need to be extreme in your actions.

Just wait a few days, then send her a Happy Christmas message or something, asking her to drop you a line when she's back if she wants to hang out then. And try not to be so serious... send her a picture of a cat asleep on a toaster or something :p
17-12-13, 01:18 PM
BackUpOrGetStng

Block her on FB so you can't check on her and wonder about her. Don't block her on your phone, but don't contact her either.
17-12-13, 01:25 PM
southerngreek

Quote:

Originally Posted by violet11 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Woah - hold up there Mr.Defensive. Block her on FB? Constantly check her page to see who she's hanging with?

Bear in mind that you were really busy and didnt have time for her before this - she could think that she messed up and you're not interested. Or, she's not interested. Either way, you don't need to be extreme in your actions.

Just wait a few days, then send her a Happy Christmas message or something, asking her to drop you a line when she's back if she wants to hang out then. And try not to be so serious... send her a picture of a cat asleep on a toaster or something :p

At this point, that's my plan. I did my best to reach out to her after my exams ended and she was busy with her "friend" so she didn't have time for me. I'll wait until Christmas and wish her a merry one. If she wants to hang out when she's back, she can find me. I just feel like I'm being overbearing and she lost interest somehow. If she's mad I didn't have sex with her, well, I don't regret not doing it given her state, so that's her own problem.

I can't help I was busy. Law school is pretty rough.
17-12-13, 01:26 PM
smackie9

Quote:

Originally Posted by southerngreek [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Hi all,

Eventually, she threatened to stop talking to me if I didn't meet up with her, so I finally agreed to it. When I met her, she was hammered drunk and I took her home. She eventually started making out with me.

She keeps saying she wants to hang out again but her actions don't indicate it.

This would turn me off. She's some kind of a nut job that plays stupid games, don't waste your time.
17-12-13, 01:36 PM
southerngreek

Quote:

Originally Posted by smackie9 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

This would turn me off. She's some kind of a nut job that plays stupid games, don't waste your time.

I am starting to get this impression. Either her friend does exist and she's busy with her, or she is playing games. She needs to be honest and tell me she doesn't want to talk and I'll just leave her alone.

She said the same thing to me back when I was studying: "if I'm bothering you and you aren't interested, just tell me." Her exact words.
17-12-13, 01:43 PM
BackUpOrGetStng

Quote:

Originally Posted by southerngreek [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

I am starting to get this impression. Either her friend does exist and she's busy with her, or she is playing games. She needs to be honest and tell me she doesn't want to talk and I'll just leave her alone.

She said the same thing to me back when I was studying: "if I'm bothering you and you aren't interested, just tell me." Her exact words.

Everyone says this, but few actually do it themselves. I don't think this girl is a nutjob, she just doesn't want a text only relationshiop, and she realizes that's all you can offer. You pretty much blew her off the whole semester, then when you did hang out with her, she rubbed her pussy in your face and you did nothing.

What's the point anyway? Winter break will be over in a few weeks and you'll be too busy to meet up with her again.
17-12-13, 01:45 PM
smackie9

Quote:

Originally Posted by southerngreek [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

She said the same thing to me back when I was studying: "if I'm bothering you and you aren't interested, just tell me." Her exact words.

This is another red flag.....I don't think this girl has any self esteem. Run! Run away as fast as you can!
17-12-13, 01:47 PM
BackUpOrGetStng

Quote:

Originally Posted by smackie9 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

This is another red flag.....I don't think this girl has any self esteem. Run! Run away as fast as you can!

Again, I think it's because he didn't show very much interest. The girl had to threaten to not speak to the guy just to get him to go out with her...
17-12-13, 01:48 PM
smackie9

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Everyone says this, but few actually do it themselves. I don't think this girl is a nutjob, she just doesn't want a text only relationshiop, and she realizes that's all you can offer. You pretty much blew her off the whole semester, then when you did hang out with her, she rubbed her pussy in your face and you did nothing.

What's the point anyway? Winter break will be over in a few weeks and you'll be too busy to meet up with her again.

Sorry but if she has to make herself so stinkin drunk, and then rub her pussy in a guy's face, that she's never been on a date with, to get his attention, she's got issues. Pretty damn sad if you ask me.
17-12-13, 01:50 PM
smackie9

I say that's pretty desperate...............
17-12-13, 01:50 PM
southerngreek

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Again, I think it's because he didn't show very much interest. The girl had to threaten to not speak to the guy just to get him to go out with her...

To be fair, I won't be exam season all semester. Law exams literally consume your life for a month between November and December and then they're over. She just met me right before I had to move into the library. I kept telling her she literally just had the worst timing in jest, but still.

She doesn't want to be friends. I think that's obvious. So I'm going to wait until she's back from break and ask her to dinner and watch a movie or something on the OFF CHANCE her friend is actually in town and I'm just being unreasonable.
17-12-13, 01:58 PM
BackUpOrGetStng

Quote:

Originally Posted by smackie9 [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Sorry but if she has to make herself so stinkin drunk, and then rub her pussy in a guy's face, that she's never been on a date with, to get his attention, she's got issues. Pretty damn sad if you ask me.

From the way he told it, it sounds like she was ****ed up before she told him to come meet up with her. Not denying that any of it is a red flag, I'm just saying he hasn't really shown much interest or made much effort, so why should she continue after a month. His reasons are valid, but they still don't change the situation.

Smackie, would you chase a guy around texting him, trying to get him to go out with you when he's only been able to see you once, and you had to threaten him? THAT'S desperate.
17-12-13, 02:02 PM
southerngreek

Quote:

Originally Posted by BackUpOrGetStng [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

From the way he told it, it sounds like she was ****ed up before she told him to come meet up with her. Not denying that any of it is a red flag, I'm just saying he hasn't really shown much interest or made much effort, so why should she continue after a month. His reasons are valid, but they still don't change the situation.

Smackie, would you chase a guy around texting him, trying to get him to go out with you when he's only been able to see you once, and you had to threaten him? THAT'S desperate.

She told me earlier that night she wanted to meet up but not late, and I said I'd meet her as soon as I finished the practice tests with my study group. It was around 10 or so. She told me she went out late and just started taking loads of shots to catch up and went overboard. I don't know what her state of mind was when she told me to come, but she told me she had only been drinking for 20 minutes when I got there.

Maybe she is a mess. Maybe it's best I do stay clear of her.

Show 40 post(s) from this thread on one page