Have been in an on-off relationship with a guy for over two years. We get on well, everything is great and then he has a 'freak out' and disappears on me only to reappear again sometimes weeks, sometimes months later desperate to see me again and pick up where we left off.
He says that for reasons he doesn't understand "he can't let me go" even though I have asked him to just leave me be because he messes with my head. He was in love once and she cheated on him and dumped him. He says that since then he keeps everyone, not just women, at arms length and doesn't want to get too close to anyone. He often uses this as the excuse as to why whenever things are going well between us he has to pull away and has diagnosed himself with serious commitment phobia- is this for real?! He says things like, "I don't know what's wrong with me/I'm going to end up a lonely old man/why would you want to be with someone like me". He also says things like "I will never find another woman as good as you, you've got everything going for you, why don't you find someone who can treat you better than I do?" But then whenever I try and get rid of him, he pops back up again full of interest and promise that quickly fades when I reciprocate. I have stuck by him firstly because you cannot control who you fall in love with and secondly I'm obviously a bit of an idiot. What the hell is up with him? Does he give a damn about me or is this 'commitment' BS just a method of stringing a woman along for as long as they can get away with it?!
