Hello everyone.
My girlfriend and I broke up a week ago. It was after a series of texting arguments that were increasing day by day. We don't get to see each other very often because of distance. She goes to college in a place very far away from my area. We get to see each other once a week on Saturdays though. We started dating like a year and seven months ago. It started as just normal dates, and we used to see each other more often in summer time. After a while, like 3 months, we both fell in love with each other. This was actually the first time I truly fall in love. The relationship became something I've never experienced before with any girl. We used to text 24/7, literally 24/7, and go out twice or three times a week back then. We were soul mates. We used to think alike, do stuff at the same time, and when we were like out with my friends or her friends, they would get amazed by how we are, how we say stuff at the same time with the same tone of voice. We had our own world.
Everything was perfect, till after our one year anni. A month passed, and it was summer. Things got horrible. We got a bit distant and we couldn't see each other a lot. We both experienced extreme jealousy, the bad type of jealousy.. The jealousy where if we just texted someone of the opposite sex, things would get messy. Things became weird. She started lying a lot too, till I started doubting her every word.
We were out on a date last summer, agreeing that the day would be just about us where we do not get to hang out with any of our friends, and she agreed to that. The date went fine, till suddenly, she said my friends are here, let's go see them. I was like no, we agreed that this day would be just about us.. She got pissed off and didn't wanna talk to me, till I decided to go with her. We kissed and went to see her friends. They were at a diner, having dinner. That's when it got out of control. She treated me like total shit in front of her two friends. I was shocked by her behavior. I didn't say a word, till we all left the diner to go grab some drinks. She apologized to me when we left, and I forgave her. We hugged our way to bar. We reached the bar, and then she started doing the same. I stood up, told her that I can't take this anymore, dumped her and left.
The break up lasted 5 months till mid November. We both contacted each other during the break up. I found out that she was dating some guy and I was ok with it of course since we weren't together. I was playing a footy match with a bunch of friends, and decided I couldn't continue playing because I was way too tired. I went back to where I left my phone, to discover over 30 texts and 5 missed calls. It was her. I miss you, I need you, etc. I must admit I felt my heart beat so fast and it was pounding, but I controlled it. I didn't reply. I got back home and by midnight, she called. She was crying. We came to an agreement that we should see each other to work things out, and we actually did. We met 3 days later. As soon as I saw her, I forgot all the shit we've been through, and we both ran towards each other and just hugged for like 2 minutes. She teared up. We got back together on the first of December.
Things went great until the last month. Jealousy kinda hit me hard lots of times, but I never made a big deal out of it like before. I never even mentioned it. It was just between me and myself. She on the other hand was jealous of my own cousin..
That's not what made us break up. What actually made us break up is the fact that I was giving way too much and receiving nothing in return. I was treating her so well, and she wasn't doing the same. That got to me. I started having doubts again though she promised she'll never lie to me again, but this time, my doubts where weird. I kept thinking she's falling for someone else since the way she was treating me was nothing close to how it was in the beginning or when we got back after a long break up. She was treating me like total shit.
When I talked to her about the things I'm feeling, my doubts and all that, she got so pissed off, and she started disrespecting me. I was shocked. I told her to chill the **** out but her anger was intense. I tried to calm her down but it didn't work. We ended up breaking up. That was a week ago.
She texted me last night, she said she's talking to her ex again, and she actually said that she doesn't love me the way she used to love me. That seriously broke my heart and hurt me like crazy. I called her and I thanked for being honest with me, and told her that it is the last time you'll ever hear my voice again. She started crying and telling me can I at least think about it? (of us getting back, ridiculous I know) I told her do whatever you want just don't ever text me again, and hung up.
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Guys, I can't get over what happened last night. I seriously can't. This was my first true relationship where I deeply fell in love. I'm hurt and heartbroken. I can't believe she's said those stuff and that she's in contact with her ex again. I swear I'm lost and I don't know what I should do. I love her a lot, but I can't trust her anymore. Her lies in the past made things very doubtful to me. I just don't know what to do. From my side, I'm not doing any mistake, but from her side, she's doing stuff that make me doubt her. Does anyone have any advice for me? I really want things to get back to the way they where in the beginning. It was, as I mentioned, something I have never experienced with a girl before. It was like magic.
Thanks in advance.
