Am I right to be suspicious? Or am I just being Paranoid?
First hello everyone and thanks for reading this :)
If you don't want to read a lot skip down to "The problem now..." and you will see what is bugging me. It is kinda long I'm sorry but there is a lot of little detail.
I have been with my girlfriend for a year and 3 months, I am 24 and she is 23.
Some Background on our relationship, can skip down to the next bold statement if you dont want to read
When we first started dating she was still friends with her ex that she was with for 3 years, I was ok with this, not happy about it because she obviously found him very attractive, but she had known him for like 7 years and who am I to come in and say who she can't be friends with.
Let it be noted that he and I look alike, blond hair, 6'2" or so, light eyes, athletic build.
Well one day her and I had plans to go to dinner, and she broke them to go to a poetry reading with him, she wore a dress and he wore a suit and they had a great time.
I lost it, I was furious, its one thing to hang out, but to break our date to hang out with him, that was too much. It almost ended right there, but then we actually became closer after the huge fight we had. To make this shorter, he isn't around any more, doesn't even live in the same part of the country.
She started a new job in June. One of her coworkers is David. One day she says to me "You know one of your sisters or friends should date David, he is cute"
One day I visited her at work, and she introduced me to everyone except David, I see him at a distance though, and like myself and her ex, he is 6'2"ish , blond, athletic build, light eyes.
I notice that a lot of the times when she hangs out with "friends" from work she is hanging out with David and a few other people, and its almost always at David's place. BBQs and such, I have NEVER been invited.
A few weeks after that I was going to meet her at her apartment, she was hanging out with "people from work" but I would stay with her later.
I packed up an overnight bag and drove the 40 minute drive to her place. I got to her place and she was supposed to meet me around midnight. 1 am rolls around and she isn't there. I tried calling her cell 3 times. No answer. So I am just sitting there in my car feeling like an idiot.
Finally I get ahold of her, she is on her way. She gets there and says "they" went for a walk. I ask why didn't she call, she said she left her cell phone in her car and didn't realize till they were far away from it, then she lost track of time.
I was extremely mad, I thought she might have got in a car accident or something, I am really mad at this point so I am like "So you just decided to ditch me and go hang out with some dude all night?" Now the look on her face when I said this wasn't guilt or anything, it was just a "What the hell are you talking about?" kind of look. Eventually we stopped fighting, and I forgot about it for a while.
Soon after, we are laying in bed and one of her female friends calls, she says "I'm hanging out with my boyfriend". A few minutes later, David calls. Her tone of voice completely changes, he asks what is she doing and she says "Oh nothing, just sitting here" never even mentions I am laying next to her the whole time. Then she gets up and leaves the room, and when she comes back 10 minutes later shes off the phone.
A couple days later she is in the living room, phone rings, and she just looks down at it and doesn't answer. I say "Whos that?" she says "Someone from work". This happens a lot, she never answers the phone around me when it is "people from work". Then she answers the phone a few days later, and that tone of voice comes back, I know she is talking to David, she leaves the room again, comes back off the phone.
I confront her and shes like "What is the big deal? He has a girlfriend, It isn't like that, I don't want a paranoid jealous boyfriend". So I let it slide.
The problem now...
Then suddenly after this she NEVER mentions hanging out with work people anymore, never mentions David ever.
We are laying on the couch. Her friend Jenny calls. Jenny is going to a movie tonight. Phone rings again a few minutes later. She runs out of the room to talk on it. When she comes back she says she is going to "Visit Jenny at 8:30 or so" So I leave her place at 8 pm almost exactly. She calls me around 8:30 and says she is on her way to "Jenny's house".
I sit down and look up movie times, the movie her friend Jenny was going to see started a 8 pm, it is 2 hours long, so best case scenario Jenny got out of the movie at 10:00 pm, but more than likely a lot later then that and wouldn't get home till 10:45ish.
So either she lied to me, or Jenny just decided to skip the movie. I call her at 11:30, I ask "So how was the movie?" she says "what?" has no idea what I mean. I say "You said Jenny was going to a movie, how was it?" She says "Oh........um......I didn't even think to ask, I'll ask next time"
A few days later she is "hanging out with Sarah" I call her cell randomly, it always takes her like 10 minutes to call me back instead of 1 or 2 like ususal, and she says she is "In the car driving home" I can tell she isn't in the car, in fact, the background sounds exactly like when I called her at "Jennys house" No noise at all in the background, as if she is in a bathroom or something at a house, she was NOT driving in her car as I have talked to her countless times when she is driving.
Last night we were laying in bed and I put my arm around her, and out of the blue she says "I'm all yours" could just be fun bedroom chat...or something else, why would she say that out of thin air while we are laying?
This morning was the kicker for me. I am sitting in her car, she drove me to her apartment the night before. Her cell is in her purse in my lap. The phone rings and I look down and it says DAVID on the screen. She looks really uncomfortable, grabs the phone and says "Hey I'll call you right back" and hangs up. Then she looks at me and says "Just so you don't have to hear me talk" and laughs nervously.
She calls me after she drops me off and says "A bunch of people from work are going biking but I'm working, sad" Then later she says she was invited to a BBQ. I tried calling her at random times, couldn't get a hold of her till midnight and she says she "Just drove around town, went to Barnes & Noble......hung out by myself"
I have a feeling Steve called to invite her over after work this morning, then she spent all day with him, and left at midnight.
So what should I do? I really love her, but I have the feeling something is going on. On one hand, if I am just being paranoid, I could ruin a good thing, she is the nicest woman I have ever met, everyone loves her. Maybe she doesn't talk about it around me because she doesn't want to fight.
However maybe she thinks I am stupid and won't notice any of this, and she has something going on.
I don't know what to do. Should I have a talk with her tommorow? Just forget about it? Think I need to stop jumping to conclusions?
Thanks a lot.
