Trying to save a 5 year relationship with Bipolar ex, one last time…

I made the choice to date a bipolar girl at age 19 back in 2010.
I became addicted to her immediately, and we dated on and off for about 5 months before making anything official. This was largely due to her being extremely manic, off her meds, hypersexual, and me getting very angry with her and never truly understand how that affected her well-being.
Regardless however, the relationship was still very special and we did love each other dearly.

After dating for another year or so, we broke up in March of 2011 after a big fight.
She began stripping (yes), got off her meds, and became a total mess.
And meanwhile, I completely lost it and even ended up in a mental hospital myself for 24 hours.
It was a terrible experience for both of us and we eventually got back together when I was finally able to try dating again after 3 weeks and she saw the potential of losing me.

When we got back together, things were really pretty good. The relationship repaired, but her parents did not like me because she had told them I had verbally abused her and they therefore kicked her out.

So, I bought her a car, cell phone, horse, and we really became almost married and had been dating for three years since then.

In the last year, I began feeling a lot of resentment towards her because she had seemed to "settle" so much in the relationship and had kinda lost her "wild" side which I was partly addicted to, and wasn't doing as much for me.

After being an IDIOT and very mean to her over the last few months, partly because our cat past away and I was depressed - she became very unhappy and we got in a big fight last weekend at a hotel while we met on a trip. (The relationship was long distance, I got her a job as a news reporter in a small town, got her an apartment out there, etc)

I was so frustrated with her that she had "ruined our vacation" with starting a drama filled conversation, that I told her to "leave" and that I never wanted to see her again, etc.

Oh was I stupid, stupid, stupid…..
She flew back to her town the next morning, and began listening to all her friends, family, and basically started ENTIRELY ignoring me.
The last 7 days – it was one thing at a time – the Facebook relationship status, then she deleted me, then she said I can have the car back, etc.
I had it shipped back the other day, and all her things are arriving tomorrow that I shipped her (several boxes).
She now has a different number, and what was a 5 year relationship is now OVER.
I blocked her on Facebook, and sent a few stupid mean messages first, then apologized, and now I just feel miserable…

I can’t believe what I’ve lost.

I know I feel the only thing I can do is not try to contact her in any way, and pray she misses me and contacts me in the next couple months.
I know she won’t replace me easily.
Is there anything I can do other then wait?
I’m willing to do ANYTHING and have money…

Thank you all.