To very quickly summarise, we got together in September 2010 after having - what we thought were unrequited - feelings for each other for almost 3 years.
A very passionate, intense relationship ensued, was meant to be forever etc - he was going through a divorce already, I split with my husband for him (unhappy marriage for years), so difficult times all round and he wasn't mature enough (even though we were both in our 40s) to cope with it all. I was going through health issues too, which affected my temper and I wasn't easy to be with (although I was mostly very loving and supportive).
I fell apart and was completely brokenhearted. I've remained single since we split in June 2011. We live in the same neighbourhood and have occasionally bumped into each other (and I did contact him a fair bit in the early days and on very, very rare occasions since - sometimes he replied, mostly he didn't), and we even spent the night together a couple of years ago.
In November 2013, I met him for a 'closure' meeting. All very civil but I got nothing from him. I'm very much calmer than I was - I'm very much changed, and for the better - and he can't help but have noticed this. I told him not a day had passed since we split that I hadn't thought of him.
I texted him twice last year. On the first, he replied but closed down any communication with a 'take care' ending. In my last text (last August) I said 'no reply necessary, I don't need a 'take care' pat on the head, be happy'. And that would have been that, I was done.
Last month, I attended a local community meeting (a protest against possible new builds on my estate). I was very surprised to see him there - he didn't know I'd seen him but, from where he was standing, I knew he must have seen me. Shortly before the meeting ending, he sneaked out and I assumed it was to avoid me.
The next day, he texted me, which I could not have been more shocked about. A friendly text, which I replied to and several messages - banter, actually - passed back and forth, which him replying when no reply was necessary. Never has he done this since we split. And then it stopped when he didn't reply to my last message.
It was my birthday last Saturday. I'd been hoping against hope he might text me (my birthday - a big one - was mentioned during the text exchange) but I was sure he wouldn't. Again, I was shocked when he actually posted a card to my house. I texted a thank you and several texts were exchanged, friendly ones. This time, I didn't reply to the last text (one wasn't needed). He mentioned he was away on holiday with his daughter (when there was no need to tell me, nor to say who he was with).
I'm puzzled. This has come out of the blue and is very, very unexpected. I'm being guarded but would welcome some viewpoints as to what's going on. I always thought he would avoid opening Pandora's Box again - my young son, now 13, took it all very badly but is now back to being my very loving boy - by having any contact with me, let alone instigating it himself. We're not friends, he's avoided contact so this friendly behaviour is very uncharacteristic. He does nothing without analysing it in great detail, so this is not a throw away action.
