For the First Time

I am almost a 30 year old Virgin, why because I choose to wait and save myself until marriage. So I have never had sex but have had questions about it. Yes I have learned about sex from my parents and sex ed classes in school, as well as seen my share of pornos.

But this is what is worrying me, is actually having sex, like when it does happen, will it hurt? I've heard it does from all first timers, for guys and girls. Other things is that even on birth control and using a condom, will those 2 really protect me 100% or will I get pregnant? I have heard people have gotten pregnant even with taking birth control and using a condom, never missing a day by the way. But yet the women got pregnant.

Other things I've thought about includes such things as, when the guy inserts his penis into my vagina and we have sex, does the guy even with the birth control and condom in effect, really have to cum inside of me? Or can they pull out and cum on the bed or a towel instead?

There's a whole lot more stuff that I have seen in porno's or heard from people on these forums or from friends etc. Now I know they say don't knock it until you try it. But a lot of these things I know I won't like or ever allow the person to do.

To me I just figured guys and girls have seen so much stuff in porno or have done it with their previous partners that they figured it will happen with their current partner or it could happen if they convince the person etc. But I know I don't want to do these things and I am afraid what if the person doesn't accept it and leaves?

I never want to do the following;

Squirt
Deep Throat
Swallow Cum
Cum on Face or in Mouth
Cum on Pussy or on Butt or on Butthole
Cum on Breasts, Stomach, Chest Areas


Among other things I can't think of right now. Also I wondered what if my partner can't even get his penis inside of me at all. What if having sex with my partner isn't good or they don't like it or I didn't do a good job and they leave me because of that? Or they leave me because of the other things I don't want to do.

I have heard about the top and bottom thing as well as the 69 position too. But to me, performing oral sex on my partner or having it done on me, isn't a turn on, it's more gross. When you think about it, yes we are human and having sex is suppose to be beautiful and intimate etc. But think about it, pee, poop, cum, and who knows what else has been in our private places, and yet we put our fingers, tongues, mouths, etc. All over us down there, it's gross when you think about it.

To me yeah I am almost reaching 30, and your not young forever and ever, but what if I am 35 or 40 and still have not had sex? Don't people say that you should have sex when you're young because that's when it will feel great, as opposed to when your older?

What if my partner only finds sex to be the intimate thing and nothing else, like even if I stand before him naked, that doesn't do it for him, or even if we perform oral, hand jobs, fingering, none of that works for him and he only finds having sex to be the intimacy for him?

I thought any guy or girl would get turned on by seeing their partner fully naked or by doing things with them, like oral sex, hand jobs, fingering, showering together naked etc. I have heard that as they say, girls sex for them is more emotionally while guys it's more physical etc.

To me I have dated a lot of the years and been in a few serious relationships even engagements and those guys accepted me wanting to wait until marriage and were happy with what we did with one another but yet I have come across some guys who as I said above, just find sex to be the intimate thing and nothing else, or they don't find the other stuff as a turn on as sex itself would be.

I am not so sure on what to do.