Is There Any Chance To Fix This Or Not?

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10-03-16, 03:10 PM
answers2016

Is There Any Chance To Fix This Or Not?

Hi. I am new to this forum and I hope I can get some helpful views from you all.

I have been friends with him for years before we have decided to have a relationship with each other. I admit that my constant complaining has pushed him away, but I was also under a lot of stress that had nothing to do with him. He broke up with me and didn't talk to me for at least a couple of weeks. When we finally did talk, I apologized to him for how I acted and he told me he felt like he was walking a tightrope while he was with me. I tried assuring him that it won't be that way and that we have way too much history to throw all of this away. He said that it will take a lot more convincing than that and that people don't just "change overnight". I have found myself trying to call him, text him, and everything. I rarely get a reply from him. He seems to call me on HIS terms or I would have to ask him is this and the day a good day to call, or I fear I won't ever hear from him again. Either way, since this breakup, it has had an impact on my eat, sleep, and I am shaken to the core about it, because I truly want this to work.

We talk maybe 2 to 3 times a week at the most now, and the last time we talked, I asked him if he still has any feelings for me. He said his feelings for me are still very strong, but right now he wants to be by himself. I asked him what will it take for him to feel comfortable around me again like he once did, and he told me it will take time. I asked him while he needs time and wants to do things in his own speed, what are the chances of him wanting to hook up with another girl or possibly wanting to be with someone else. He said he isn't even considering that.

He has a picture of me on his computer background that he had on there when we were together, yet I can't get a simply reply from him when I ask him how work is going. It's apparent I still have feelings for him and I want us to have another shot. When I told him this, he said he is being extremely cautious and wants to take things very slowly. I wanted to know if it would take him years to get to the point where we were before (since it took years of friendship for us to try a relationship with each other) and he said no, but he isn't sure how long. Are there any other things I should ask him to see if I am wasting my time or not or should I just be patient and let him "do things at his speed" like he said? From the information I have provided, is there any hope of us getting back together, or am I wasting my time?
10-03-16, 10:55 PM
topazlight

Are you in a long distance relationship? When did you last see each other in person?

He sounds like the last break fractured some of his feelings and trust for you, and when that happens people will usually move on to protect themselves. Just because he tells you he isn't dating, doesn't mean he isn't dating, could be he doesn't want you knowing his business anymore, same goes for other areas of his life. Instead of driving yourself crazy wondering if you two can have another chance, see him irl and ask, look at his face how he looks at you, you'll know then for yourself. Outside of that I do believe you are wasting your time. Sorry.
30-03-16, 06:45 PM
answers2016

Quote:

Originally Posted by topazlight [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]

Are you in a long distance relationship? When did you last see each other in person?

He sounds like the last break fractured some of his feelings and trust for you, and when that happens people will usually move on to protect themselves. Just because he tells you he isn't dating, doesn't mean he isn't dating, could be he doesn't want you knowing his business anymore, same goes for other areas of his life. Instead of driving yourself crazy wondering if you two can have another chance, see him irl and ask, look at his face how he looks at you, you'll know then for yourself. Outside of that I do believe you are wasting your time. Sorry.

Hi,

Sorry that I am just now replying. Yes we are long-distance. The last time I saw him was last summer and we was going to see each other last month until things went awry the way they did.

I do have an update, however, since the last time I posted in here. have given up calling him, because I have realized how pathetic and desperate I have made myself to be. The conversation we had before I finally got tired of always calling him and texting him was him saying that the reason why he has been avoiding me was because when we did talk, all I wanted to talk about was where my head was and where his head was instead of just having a natural conversation, and letting things go natural and respecting that he needs to do things at his speed. Also he said that when I do text him and if he doesn't respond right away, I start texting him incessantly, and calling him nonstop (freaking out) and he says I need to relax, which is true. I do need to relax. So when I finally got tired of always calling him and texting him, I backed up and sure enough, he has been calling and sending me a text here and there. If I have time to talk, then we'll talk, if not, then I'll tell him we can talk another time.

Now that things seemed to have simmered down some, we have talked about things regarding us here and there and it went from "maybes" to "eventually". So, to me, that is a good sign. We seem to be rebuilding, but slowly, like he says. Meanwhile, I am living my life because when it is all said and done, I only have one life to live and one only. Thanks for reading.