Looking for advice! Long-term relationship been long-term on the rocks

Hi guys!

Thank you for reading my post here.

I'm a 33 years old male. I've been with a woman for 8 1/2 years. We're not married, we're engaged. We also have a 1 1/2 year old toddler. The time has been nothing short of a roller coaster with a lot of highs and frankly more downs.

Lately things have been tanking between us and I have several ideas why. Sex only occurs 1-2 times per month. This is waaaaay down from when we first got together, which could be 2-3 times per week. It was on a steady decline for years, but really started to bottom out after we had our son. I really don't feel the intimacy is there, and it's a product of a broken relationship.

Where things get a bit complicated is this: I've always had issues with our day-to-day relationship. She was raised by a helicopter parent, and I didn't always see this as a bad thing. But now it's absolutely killing me. I lost my job 7 months ago (more on that later), but even when I was working 2 jobs, going to school full time, and commuting time, I still had to do household chores like sweep/mop/laundry/etc. Yeah we live in a new age we can't expect your genitals to dictate who does household chores, but my complaint is that she never even took initiative to do any of it. Matter of fact she hardly obeyed me when I asked her to do it.

Then comes our son. Don't get me wrong; when he was born he was the light of my world, and has made so many dark days so much brighter. In short, I love him to death. I watch her parenting skills, if you want to even call it that. She stays on her phone, on Facebook, watches TV and so on. I've begged, I've pleaded, I've cajoled, I can't get thru to her. And yes, I've sat down like a rational adult and we've "talked" not yelled. I lost my job 7 months ago, and boy do I feel so exhausted because I have to play house-wife 24/7.

She works part-time, at a job that's an hour-ish away. She's gone maybe 40-45 hours total a week, working no more than 27 hours. That's time I can't spend working because she works flex schedule: some nights/some days. In a way, I feel resentful like she's the one holding me back from work. I know it sounds like an excuse.

I know there's a lot to read up there, but if anyone can help out, that'd be great. Of course there's a lot more. I don't really have any more friends to lean on anymore.