Looking for advice with my best friend
Hey everyone, I have a dilemma and it's eating me up inside.
I have this best friend, she's in her early 30s and has 2 kids. I met her last summer and we hit it off great. At the time, she has in the middle of a divorce and not looking for a relationship, so we started out as friends. We would hang out a few times a week and text everyday. We'd play games with her kids, go to the park, play in the yard, etc etc. Things were great, I was really happy with her and her kids really enjoyed my company. Her and I started to get closer and closer over the course of 3 months. We began cuddling on the couch and watching movies, holding hands, she would text me how she missed me and wishes I was there with me, etc. I felt as though she was really into me. She eventually stopped talking to me for 6 months because she felt we got too close and she scared herself off.
Recently in january we reconnected. She appologized for what happened, said she got scared and wanted to be friends again. It's been a real joy having her back in my life. Its as if things were just back to normal. We still play games with her kids and her and I go out to eat at least once a week typically and still talk regularly. This time around though, I haven't been on the 'lovey dovey' side of things. I'm not trying to scare her off again or make her uncomfortable as I don't want to lose her again. She has a 'date' tomorrow night, dinner with another guy and it's really made me uncomfortable. On one hand, she's my best friend and is free to do what she wants right? On the other hand, I had secretely hoped that when she was ready to date again, that I would be given a real chance since there was always feelings in the past... I've been falling for this girl everyday more and more but I'm afraid to tell her in case she walks out of my life again...
Scared and unsure what to do, does this date with this other guy mean anything significant? Does she just not see me anymore? Lost and out of options, I just don't know what to do anymore.
