Am I jealous, crazy, or do I have a point?
Hello!
My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 months. We dated previously for about 6, and broke up during last summer.
He's in his mid 40's (I'm in my mid 30's) and lives in a townhouse style home. His neighbors are 2 29 year old attractive single women.
When we first got back together around 8 months ago, he had mentioned how he had gotten close with his neighbors over the summer since they share a yard, a wall, etc.
They grilled out, had bonfires, would walk to the corner bar, maintained a backyard garden together.
I didn't really think too much of it at first and it was not troublesome. Then I have noticed that there have been some patterns with the behavior and interaction.
First, it is not uncommon for them to text my boyfriend late at night asking him to come out drinking with them. I find this annoying.
Secondly, On more than one occasion (probably 3-4 times in the last 8 months), they have stood outside of his 2nd story bedroom window late at night (later than 11) assumedly drunk, screaming for him or at us.
On St. Patrick's day night, they stood outside of his door at 2:30 am banging on it and screaming for us to wake up.
On a Wednesday evening, they texted him at 11pm while we were in bed, asking him to come out to the bar with them.
When we are sitting in his living room with the windows open, on a couple of occasions, one of them has popped her head into the window to say hello uninvited and unannounced while we were together on the couch.
When I had him over to my house for a Christmas party, one of them texted him wanting him to come home because her ex boyfriend was allegedly walking around their house making her uncomfortable (Why not call the cops if it's truly a concern?)
All of this happens probably, on average, once a week or so when I'm with him.
Every time we are outside, enjoying a glass of wine, or grilling, they join. It's like an unspoken invite between them.
My frustration lies with not only their (what I consider to be) inappropriate, immature, and disrespectful behavior, but the fact that my boyfriend has not addressed it and put a stop to it and implemented some reasonable boundaries.
I have gently brought up to him before that their behavior makes me sometimes feel devalued/disrespected and that I don't appreciate the late night screaming or texts. He has defended it or brushed it off as "they're just young" or "they're my neighbors, what do you want me to do?"
I don't necessarily think anything sexual would ever happen and it's not really that I have a problem with them being friends. I also don't necessarily think there's a sexual interest or that he would cheat on me with them.
They do talk to me, are friendly with me and kind to me, but this behavior is beyond irritating.
One of them was mentioning this past weekend that she was considering moving. My boyfriend subsequently told me that he didn't want her to move. He explained it was only because he likes knowing who is living next to him.
I spend 3 nights a week with him. I can only imagine the kind of crap they do when I'm NOT there since they intrude so often when I am.
Am I being jealous? Should I bring this up to him, and if so, how?