Quote:
Strategies which might help or have helped you, but need not necessarily help others... ever thought about that?
Yes, of course I've thought of that. How do you think I've come to the conclusion that I have ... going by the posts.. what they are doing is not helping many of them to resolve to never call their ex again.
Quote:
Well, if it was all about brain power when you need to let go off someone, we wouldn't post here, we would just do it, wouldn't we?
So many who post in this thread show lots of symptoms of codependency and this thread is also a symptom of codependency.
Quote:
Emotions are a bit more tricky and often intervene with what people's minds think is best. The subconsicous over the conscious.
That I agree with. Tis why I try to bring the sub to the fore and show that them that by the evidence, it would appear that they like their pain or they'd have resolved that no contact is in their own best interests and they'd not cave. Thats how I see it.
Quote:
And I also think that everyone has their right time when they are ready to really let go... some need to write or talk about how they miss their exs for days, some for weeks, some for months but then suddenly comes the time when it clicks and they actually are able to let go.
That is my point. If they change things up then perhaps they'll let go and something will click soon for therm.
Quote:
The writing and talking is nothing but preparing and paving the way for this moment.
Why make it such a long and winding road, I wonder?
[qute] Oh and yes, some never get over it, simply because they can't or deep inside don't want to let go...[/quote] That's what I see when I see these people post in here day after day.. people afraid to let go.
Quote:
wakeup, I feel you tend to write with your brain, which is good, but sometimes people need to read something that comes from the heart, speaking heart to heart...
i get your point but IMO there are enough people in here that post in that manner I'm thinking.
Quote:
Another thing: you seem to love to give advice. I, however, find you're usually not even suggesting, but you're explicitely telling people what's best for them to do. From a psychological point of view that's not very helpful. Shouldn't people rather be empowered here in this forum to figure that out themselves?
They can read and if it helps then so be it. If it doesn't then they can choose to ignore it. It isn't always helpful, but it isn't always NOT helpful either. As one poster put it "I'm a pain in the ass" but I'm usually spot on about it"
Quote:
And finally... the german word for advice is "Ratschlag" which is made up of 2 words: "Rat" = "advice" and "Schlag" = "beat/hit"... so it means you are "hit by advice"... and being hits always hurts...
(sorry but) *rolls eyes*