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That's true. Also the older you get the more difficult it becomes to become pregnant. One of my co-workers was trying to get pregnant by her husband since her late twenties, she only got pregnant ten years later. There are also issues of health, the older women get the more negative health consequences there are to consider. More likelihood of damage to the baby or the mother.Quote:
Originally Posted by Indignant [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
I can't completely agree with you.
I also think the younger you are, the more resentment there will be for the child.
Those that have children later will most likely be making a more calculated decision.
I also don't mind the idea of adoption.
I wouldn't mind adoption at the age of 40. Grandparents usually like raising their grandchildren. I'll be a parent when I should be a grandparent hehe.
I love my lifestyle so much right now. I would certainly not be on LF posting. I can imagine the stress, etc. It's a gift but it's a gift I can deal without right now.
Oh, and I doubt the bonding thing. I watched my grandparents deal with newborns and toddlers. If I am physcially fit at "old age" then all is well. I have noticed great bonding from older people. But that's just my observation.
Bottom line... too young right now to be giving serious thought to having children... probably spend the next few years trying to straighten out my life... accomplish some goals I have been wanting to do... enjoy life... and after all that, if I still have this inclination to want children then I may have children.
Till then, if nothing else... I want to make something of my life, enjoy it... and if I should have any kids... I'll have the 'lead by example' approach which should make raising them a little easier.
May not be the best plan... but it's what I got right now... and hopefully it'll keep me out of trouble...
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Originally Posted by lesa [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
I was in a similar situation Lesa. My last boyfriend was desperate to have a family. It was the reason why we broke up because we wanted different things from life.
Being a parent is the most important job and I have the utmost respect for parents (especially the good ones). I however am not sure that I am up for that job.
I imagine myself being one of those crazy animal ladies (Simpson's cat lady???) and devoting my life to other volunteer causes.
Anyone that knows what I chose to do for a living also knows I want kids of my own as soon as possible and lots of them. I'm a kindergarden teacher..
I think it's very ironic that genuine, responsible and caring people are choosing not to have children, while people who shouldn't have kids have them by bucket loads. It reminds me of film by Mike Judge called Idiocracy [url]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Idiocracy[/url] it's scary to think that what's shown there is even a remote possibility.
I propose a coalition of "responsible and caring adults for having lots of children" to out breed the irresponsible ones!
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Originally Posted by Nina [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Haha I used to teach as well and that just turned me off the little bastards ;)
Yeah, having a family can be a dealbreaker in relationships. Many people don't realize that until they are deep in the relationship. My married friend hopefully won't experience what we did (Especially since she is married). Her husband wants lots of children and she has none yet and is in her early thirties. She probably doesn't understand that this could be a major conflict in her relatonship. I'm not going to interfere and hope everything will be okay with them.Quote:
Originally Posted by Dasein [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Parenthood is great but should I have them if I really don't feel up to the work? I believe I would be a great parent if it happens but it just scares the crap out of me. And my ex had the added problem of wanting sons. If he wasn't like that I probably would have been more willing. I felt like I would be abandoned if things didn't work as he planned with having children.
And I babysat them hehe ;)Quote:
Originally Posted by Dasein [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Actually it was fun.
Would people be less scared of having kids if they came with instructions?
(Ponders ideas for a future book)
I completely disagree with this. Except for mbe Ben Buttons.Quote:
Originally Posted by Indignant [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Its always the young, obviously struggling moms that are freaking out on their kids in the public places, not the older ones. And if they can't control themselves in public, then it can only be worse in private. Whether its b/c they are tired or wiser, dunno, but the kids with older parents always seem better for it.
I posted this before but its such an excellent book it deserves another link:Quote:
Originally Posted by Mishanya [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
[url]http://www.omnipotentchild.com/omnipotentchild.html[/url]
That's a catch-22 if ever I saw one.Quote:
Originally Posted by Mishanya [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Totally disagree. All of the older parents I know enjoy their kids more because they usually don't have the financial struggles younger couples have to deal with.Quote:
Originally Posted by Indignant [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]