do you know why you feel that pain? because you got your favourite toy taken away. it's as simple as that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Yet another guy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
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do you know why you feel that pain? because you got your favourite toy taken away. it's as simple as that.Quote:
Originally Posted by Yet another guy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
You've lost me with your analogy. :surprisedQuote:
Originally Posted by Sonrisa [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
well, basically we develop feelings towards things, people, habits. and once it's taken away we feel pain.
Well, I'm not an expert in psychology, so I can't argue with that. This is several magnitudes greater than any pain I have felt from losing anything though. I don't think I have cried about anything else since childhood.
There's two ways to get better from losing my favourite toy. One is forgetting about it. I can't see that happening any time soon. The other is getting a new favourite toy which isn't exactly easy in this context.
and what context would that be?
Err, the context is relationships. So a new toy is analogous to a new love. So what I'm saying is that finding a new love isn't easy (for me).
a new love can be artificially created
FYI, about 98% of the things Sonrisa says come from conversations with imaginary people during schizophrenic episodes.Quote:
Originally Posted by Yet another guy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
An important part of my love is the desire to be loved back. How do I realize that artificially?
buy a goldfish
Let's see:
-Finally quit smoking weed
-Do well at exams
-Get laid
-Get with this girl in college, whom I just met
Not necessarily in that order.
ughm, i though we just agreed that there's no such thing as love? then do you mean that you want to have intimate relations?Quote:
Originally Posted by Yet another guy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
Yes, you did try to explain my pain using other words but I find it difficult to fit all of my feelings into that theory. I wasn't talking about intimate relations though I do want to have those with her.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonrisa [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
then what is it?Quote:
Originally Posted by Yet another guy [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
I don't know, I'm confused.Quote:
Originally Posted by Sonrisa [Dear Guest/Member you have to reply to see the link.click here to register]
I'll try to explain my feelings without calling it love.
I have:
Affection for X
Desire for Xs affection
Desire that X depends on my affection the same way I would depend on Xs affection (safety, trust)
Desire for intimate relationship with X (closeness)
Sexual desire for X (passion)
Desire to satisfy Xs sexual desires
... there might be more, I'm not good at introspection.
I feel pain from knowing that:
X does not have feelings for me
My feelings for X are not accepted
My needs aren't fulfilled (trust, closeness, passion)
I cannot fulfill Xs needs (weight on I, because X probably has her needs taken care of since she doesn't need me)
I call it love because its more concise. I also find this kind of affection artificially quite hard and fulfilling the desires is even harder.
By the way, we have strayed a bit off topic.