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i think men and women very much follow roles. maybe they're not the same roles as before, but roles nonetheless.
anyway, i think you should give it a chance. maybe you're feeling stuck because you guys live together and that is a big adjustment. i don't know, i'd like to think that given a little effort and a little time that things will work out. and if not then at least you tried, you know? but you'll do whatever is in your heart, valid reason or none.
My point is that everybody, male and females are now raised so that they don't need to be dependent on the other sex to get along with their life. Which in turn makes it more likely for couples to break up as soon as things get rough.Quote:
Originally Posted by misombra
This is why relationships should be better. Because neither one needs to live together. So it is a matter of wanting. Any relationship where two people live together is tough early on. Little things start to irritate you, your both crossing each others space. Clashes happen.Quote:
Originally Posted by Frasbee
Point is, it is really easy to run away. To avoid facing anything and just thinking someone else will be better. That saying, "The grass is always greener" is a bunch of crap. The grass is as good as you want it too be.
If you have not talked to her about what is bothering you. Why you feel the way you do, then your are a lame arse. Your are avoiding being mature and you'll just repeat the same avoidance crap again another relationship.
It may not work out and if you truly deeply dont care for her then tell her it was a mistake for you and end it. But if you miss your independence, why is that?
Can't you go out with your buddies sometimes ? Does she order you too stay in, or are you creating your own prison cause your afraid of a confrontation if you go out with your friends. Just think about not just what you feel but why and what is causing it. Look past the "we are living together" to the deeper issue of why you feel trapped. Sometimes we make our own prison in our minds when it doesn't even exist. Only you know the true reasons, but remember..............there is a classic 80's Cinderella song 'Dont know what ya got till its gone......"
yes i agree.
That's all well and good.
But that's actually beside my point.
I never said anything about whether couples back then were happy or not, I was stating that they were more likely to stay together because of their roles. Regardless of their feelings with the relationship.
Sparkey so are you saying i should tough it out? And it also sounds to me like you're saying people should get married but live in seperate houses :smug: just kidding. But you're right on a lot of things I'm probably too immature to be in a relationship right now, and I'm an arse for not telling her what's bothering me, this is why a lot of relationships crumble.
Koolzero,
If You could break things off and everyboy comes out fine and dandy, no hard feelings, would You do it ASAP?
Well I suppose you could wait to tell her until you guys get engaged and then it wouldn't be so bad for her. No wait better yet wait till you get married because then you can involve lawyers and that's always fun. Better yet throw a few kids in the mix before telling her because that way you can all share in the break up as a family. Is this making sense to you? No? Then I think you know what you need to do. The longer you wait, the worst it gets.
I've been in a similar situation twice. If you'd rather be single (you know if you want to) then do it. IF she wanted to be single she would too. It's tough being the dumper, really tough- looking at your last post you may have already broken it off, or not... but take my advice... if you want out, get out. Keep busy for the next few months or it'll get you down... and be prepared for her to hate you. Make an effort to be friends if you want, but it rarely happens.
Shitty reality, but you;ll be better off during the prime summer months.